God does not call the equipped, He equips the called. Words that I uttered today at my VERY FIRST (yes you are reading this correctly) opportunity as a motivational speaker at a local school – Highschool Bekker. I don’t know who I quoted today, but two other people have said that to me and I can confirm – IT IS SO TRUE!!!
Just as I was about to leave this afternoon, I felt something at the pit of my stomach. Doubt was trying to do his thing with me, but, I saw him from a mile away and kicked him to one side, not giving him a chance to get close enough to fill my mind with lies and other things.
Inside of me, I feel that I am not a Public Speaker. When I told someone that, they laughed and said Moses also thought that he was not a public speaker. I thought about that for a moment and nodded my head in acknowledgement because I agree with it. Moses had so many excuses about why he could not talk to the Pharaoh.
Back at today’s event. The “feeling” was there, but I just prayed and asked God to place the right words in my mouth, words that He wanted me to give through to the people listening today. Not once did I feel as if my tongue and mouth was all dried up, unable to speak. I did not forget what I wanted to say, even if I did not prepare a formal speech.
AND I did not shake like a leaf in fear of people, like I normally do. God equips the called. That is all that He wanted me to do. He wanted me to get into my car, drive there, speak to the people and He will do the rest. I pray that it was so, because, I cannot remember everything that I said.
Normally when that happens (the part where I cannot remember what was said), I know that it is God that takes over. The long and short of my speech? It is the same thing that I said over and over this past weekend and what the whole Beroepsvrou blog is about…How pink are YOUR feathers for God?
What do you put into yourself so that you reflect pink for Him so that you are a light bearer in this world? Do you filter those things that the world throws at you, casting out the bad? Just like flamingos filter their food, we should filter that which is going on around us.
I pray that God’s message came through, that everyone listened and heard, and that the Holy Spirit will come and water the seeds that were sown so that they will grow. Seeds that will glorify Him.
Mr. Rademan – thank you for the opportunity to talk to your staff today. I pray that I did leave a little bit of something to motivate them, so that they will also have Pink Feathers for God. Because if they have Pink Feathers for God, then the children will start to see it and their feathers will also start to turn pink. This way God will touch everyone to have Pink Feathers for Him and not be ashamed to call them His children.
Lastly I want to sing my praises to God and give Him ALL THE GLORY for today. He equipped me today. I am called and I am His. He will show me the way. He will make a road in the desert, let a river spring forth in the wilderness, just like the scripture reads that is on my notebooks. God confirmed this again to me at the beginning of 2022 – how many more signs do I want? How many sheep skins do I have to put out like Gideon did or see wonders like Moses?
Always remember, God is always with you and if you struggle with something, just pray and ask for help and He WILL come through for you. He will guide you and show you the way that you must go. He’s got your back – that is why you only put on a breastplate that covers the front – you must protect your heart (and of course you must put on the rest of the armor too). God will protect you from behind – always. He has never disappointed me and never will.
He is the same – yesterday, today and tomorrow. I know I am SOLD OUT to Jesus!! Are you? How pink are your feathers for God?
God does not call the equipped, He equips the called. Woorde wat ek vandag geuiter het by my HEEL EERSTE (ja jy lees reg) geleentheid om as motiveringspreker te praat by ‘n plaaslike skool – Hoërskool Bekker. Ek weet nie wie daardie wyse woorde gesê het nie, maar twee mense het dit al vir my gesê en ek kan getuig – DIS SO WAAR!!!
Net voordat ek by die huis ry vanmiddag, voel ek of daar so hol kol op my maag begin kom. Twyfel probeer sy ding met my, maar ek het hom al ‘n myl ver sien aankom en skop hom sommer eenkant toe, gee hom nie kans om naby genoeg te kom om leuens en goed in my kop te prop nie.
Ek voel binne in my, ek is nie ‘n Public Speaker nie. Toe ek dit vir iemand sê, toe lag die persoon en sê Moses het ook gedink hy was nie een nie. Ek dink toe nogal daaraan en knik my kop omdat ek saam stem met dit. Moses het allerhande verskonings gehad oor hoekom hy nie met die Farao (jitte die lyk verkeerd gespel, maar kom ons beweeg aan) kon praat nie.
Terug by vandag. So die hol kol was daar, maar ek het net gebid en gevra dat die Here die regte woorde in my mond sal plaas, dit wat Hy wou deurgee aan die mense wat na my geluister het. Nie een keer het ek gevoel my tong plak vas aan my verhemelte nie (dit gebeur gewoonlik). Ek het nie vergeet wat ek wou sê nie, al het ek nie formeel voorberei met ‘n toespraak nie.
EN ek het nie gebewe soos ‘n riet soos ek altyd doen nie. God equips the called. Dis al wat Hy wou gehad het. Hy wou gehad het dat ek in my kar klim, ry soontoe, gaan praat en dan sal Hy die res doen. Ek bid regtig dat dit so was, want, ek kan nie alles onthou wat ek gesê het nie.
Gewoonlik as dit gebeur (waar ek nie alles kan onthou nie), weet ek dis die Here wat oorneem en praat. Die lang en die kort van my toespraak? Is dieselfde wat ek oor en oor vir mense die naweek ook gesê het, en waaroor die hele Beroepsvrou blog gaan….Hoe pienk is JOU vere vir die Here?
Wat sit jy in jouself in, sodat jy pienk projekteer vir Hom en ‘n ligdraer is in hierdie wêreld? Filter jy dit wat die wêreld na jou toe gooi en werp die slegte uit? Soos wat flaminke hul kos filter, so moet ons alles wat om ons gebeur filter.
Ek bid regtig dat God se boodskap deurgekom het, dat almal geluister het en gehoor het, en dat die Heilige Gees sal kom natmaak sodat die saad wat gesaai is sal opkom. Saad wat Hom sal verheerlik.
Mnr. Rademan – baie dankie vir die geleentheid om jou personeel te kon toespreek vandag. Ek bid regtig dat ek so ietsie gelos het by hulle om hul te motiveer, sodat hulle Pienk Vere vir die Here sal hê. Want as hulle Pienk Vere vir die Here gaan hê, gaan die kinders dit begin sien en so gaan hul vere ook pienk begin verkleur. So gaan die Here almal aanraak om Pienk Vere vir Hom te hê en nie skaam wees om hulle Sy kinders te noem nie.
Laastens wil ek net my lof besing vir God en vir Hom AL DIE EER gee. He equipped me today. I am called and I am His. He will show me the way. Hy sal ‘n pad in die woestyn maak, ‘n rivier in die wildernis soos die skrifvers lees wat ek ontvang het en op my notaboeke ingesit het. Die Here het WEER aan die begin van 2022 vir my dit bevestig – hoeveel meer tekens wil ek dan nou hê? Hoeveel velletjies gaan ek NOG moet uitgooi soos Gideon of wonders sien gebeur soos Moses?
Onthou altyd, God is met jou en as jy sukkel en jy bid en vra vir hulp, SAL die Here deurkom vir jou. Hy sal jou lei en Hy sal jou die pad wys wat jy moet stap.He’s got your back – dis hoekom jy net ‘n borsharnas wat voor bedek aantrek – jy moet jou hart beskerm (en die res van die wapenrusting natuurlik aantrek). God sal jou van agter beskerm – altyd. Hy het my nog nooit teleurgestel nie en sal ook nooit nie.
Hy is dieselfde – gister, vandag en môre. Ek weet ek is UITVERKOOP aan Jesus!! Is jy? Hoe pienk is jou vere vir die Here?
During February (my busiest time ever) I saw an advertisement on Facebook for an Easter Market that will be hosted locally (and literally around the corner of my house). I feel how God is working in my spirit telling me to do this and take this on.
Never in my life, have I done a market myself. I do remember as a child that my mother attended flea markets to sell her handmade wired trees with stones stuck on for leaves (that was high fashion at the time, let me tell you). My sister joined in later, when she was older, making clay objects that were sold.
After writing the previous paragraph, I wonder about two things – why they call it a flea market and why my mom (and sister) sold their handmade items at flea markets? I remember that I was always an eager beaver (almost like my daughter now with the Easter market) – always ready to help.
Well, back to MY first market that I felt God gave me instructions to take on. My goodness, this was a challenge. In my busiest time ever, one Sunday afternoon I designed more mouse pads and notebooks. Because, come on, you cannot do a market like that with one design of a notebook and one of a mouse pad! People need options and choices!
Diaries, tent calendars and desk pads are put to the side at this time, because, by the time it will be the market, it will be April and I am not going to design anything new for 2022 in that regard. Plus, if you missed out on 2022’s products, then you have to watch this space for 2023’s products, to be quick to make your purchase before they are sold out….
Oh my word, I am distracted again. None the less, new designs were done, I submitted the application for the market and take, once again, one MASSIVE leap of faith. Because, what else do you call this that is busy happening? It started with 10 aprons that I ordered, not knowing WHAT to do with it. And here I am, at my first market.
The people that pass my table probably think to themselves, this is a crazy lady. My first words to them are “I write, you can read if you want to.” and then I stick a business card in their hand, whether they want one or not. Then I start chatting about flamingo’s and what God has revealed to me thus far about it.
Some people buy something, others just nod their heads very politely, saying that they will go and read. Nowhere in any of the conversations I had, I introduced myself to them. One woman asked me my name and seemed very keen to read my blog. The free gift (from Sculpted Clay designs – specially designed for me in the shape of the heart of the leave that is in my logo) is a winner, and it seems almost if that is the item that convince some people to buy something.
To sit at the market, talking to people, is probably the easiest part of the whole process. The preparation, on the other hand (oh my goodness – when ever I use that phrase, I think of Naas Botha on Super Sport saying On the other hand Darren) was very interesting. I had this idea in my head of what I wanted to do on the table. I am convinced that the display is also directly from Heaven, because, for the first time ever, I could follow through on the idea that was in my mind AND call it pretty.
I had to sand down (is that the right word? Afrikaans is skuur) wooden boxes, also using paint stripper to remove the excess paint (first time for me but now I know how that works), purely because I did not want to spend MORE money for marketing and the props and who knows what. I borrowed a table cloth, took some things out of my house. Bought some other items and borrowed a last little something from someone. Deciding HOW MUCH stock to buy was another puzzle to resolve….
I thought, going through the stock, just after fetching it, and marking it will be easy. Think again!! It took hours and in the process I learned A LOT. Like – I want to save for a barcode printer of some sort. And have my own table cloths made, and buy a doll on which the apron is displayed. To name only a few.
I did my day job, you know, the one that puts food on the table, between everything and on Thursday, I put 11 hours in (yes – in one day) to finalise that work, before I granted myself the time to take photo’s of the new stock for the website and to finalise the preparation for the Market. What an interesting evening it was. Little sleep, watching a movie between marking and writing the labels, but I managed, by the grace of God and finished in time.
While I was at the market, watching all the people that entered the building, my eyes caught a phrase on one of the posters I made. Flamingo’s are filter feeders…. I stop for a moment to think. Filter feeders. Mmmm… this is interesting. Then it dropped in my spirit like a coin does in a piggybank.
The world and everything around you is full of things. Stuff. Some are good for you and others bad. The things that are the nicest, are not always the best for you. But we have to be like flamingos. We must FILTER what we take in, so that we can be sure to let our feathers change pink and stay that way for God. I googled the meaning of filter feeder. As opposed to predators who seek out specialized food items, filter feeding is simply opening up your mouth and taking in whatever happens to be there, while filtering out the undesirable parts. Wow. It is up to us to purify what we take in. To cast out the bad and undesirable items.
Wow. This is such an interesting journey that I am on. God reveals everything systematically to me as I go along, while taking the next step blindly to follow Him. Unconditional. Faith like a child. A mustard seed’s faith. Placing hope on that which cannot be seen. Planted and rooted in Him so that the winds of doubt will not let me be moved around like waves in the ocean. Everything out of scripture.
I’m sold out….nananana Jesus….I’m SOLD OUT TO YOU!!! These words are dancing around again in my mind. The song that God gave me as the theme song for everything (if I can call it that) – the whole Beroepsvrou thing. I listen to it often, yet I cannot remember the words exactly if the song is not playing. Long and short is – I am SOLD OUT to Jesus. I am like the song says – DIFFERENT than other people. Created for THIS purpose.
I ain’t like no one you’ve met before. I’m running for the front when they’re all running for the door. And I won’t sitdown, won’t back out, you can never shut me up, ’cause I’m on a mission and I won’t quit now. In a world full of followers, I’ll be a leader, in a world full of doubters, I’ll be a believer. I’m stepping out without a hesitation. Because the battle’s already been won. I’m sold out, I’m no longer living just for myself. Running after Jesus with my whole heart. And now I’m ready to show I am sold out, I’m sold out!!!
I have to stop myself from typing the whole song here. But I am sure you understand what I am trying to say. This song just TALKS to my spirit. I cannot have anything less than Pink Feathers for God and to tell people about that. I pray that seed was sown through conversations and that the Holy Spirit will water it when the time is right for those people. Thank you God that You chose ME for this purpose and may I ALWAYS glorify God’s name.
Gedurende Februarie (my besigste tyd ooit) sien ek ‘n advertensie op Facebook vir ‘n Paasmark wat plaaslik (en letterlik om die draai van ons huis) aangebied word. Ek voel hoe die Here in my gees werk en my aansê om dit aan te pak.
Ek het nog nooit in my lewe ‘n mark self gedoen nie. Ek onthou wel as kind het my ma gereeld by vlooimarkte gaan sit en haar handgemaakte draadboompies met klippies opgeplak (dit was hoogmode kan ek net vir julle vertel) gaan verkoop. My sussie het later klei goedjies begin maak en ook verkoop.
Ek wonder oor twee goed na ek die vorige paragraaf geskryf het – hoekom noem hulle dit ‘n vlooimark en hoekom het my ma (en sussie) hul handgemaakte goed gaan verkoop by vlooimarkte? Ek onthou ek was altyd eager beaver (amper soos wat my dogtertjie nou is met die Paasmark) en gretig om te help.
Nou ja, terug by MY eerste mark wat ek voel die Here instruksie gegee het om aan te pak. Liewe aarde, was dit nou vir jou ‘n storie. In my besigste tyd ooit, gaan sit ek toe natuurlik een Sondagmiddag en ontwerp nog muismatte (ek like nogals die Afrikaanse woord – ek voel gesofistikeerd as ek hom gebruik) en notaboeke. Mense het opsies en keuses nodig.
Dagboeke, tentkalenders en deskpads staan vir eers opsy, want, teen die tyd dat dit die mark is, sal ons al in April wees en ek gaan nie nou vir 2022 enige iets nuuts in daardie opsig ontwerp nie. Plus, as jy nou uitgemis het op 2022 se produkte, moet jy maar die spasie dop hou vir 2023 se produkte en vinnig wees om dit op te raap voor dit uitverkoop is….
Ai, daar raak ek ALWEER distracted. Nie te min, nuwe ontwerpe word gedoen, ek skryf myself in vir die mark en vat weereens een MOEWIESE geloofstap. Want wat anders noem mens dit wat besig is om te gebeur? Dit het begin met 10 voorskote wat ek laat maak het en nie geweet het WAT ek met dit gaan doen nie. En hier is ek nou, by my eerste mark.
Die mense wat by my tafel verby loop dink seker by hulself, die vrou is mal. Want my eerste woorde aan hulle is “Ek skryf, jy kan gaan lees as jy wil.” en dan prop ek ‘n besigheidskaartjie in hul hand, of hul nou een wil hê of nie. Dan begin ek gesels en vertel hulle van die flaminke en wat die Here reeds aan my openbaar het oor dit.
Sommige mense koop iets, ander knik net ordentlik en sê dis reg, hul sal gaan lees. Nêrens in die gesprekke wat ek gehad het, het ek myself voorgestel nie. Een vrou het my gevra wat is my naam en gretig gelyk om te gaan lees. Die gratis geskenkie (van Sculpted Clay Designs – spesiaal ontwerp vir my in die vorm van die hartjie wat in my logo se blaartjie is) is ‘n wenner, en dit lyk amper of dit die oortuiging is vir sommige mense om iets te koop.
Om by die mark te sit en met mense te praat is die maklikste deel seker ooit van die hele proses. Die voorbereiding, aan die ander kant, was nogals ‘n interessante een gewees. Ek het hierdie idee in my kop gehad van wat ek wou doen op die tafel. Ek is oortuig dit kom ook direk uit die Hemel uit, want vir die eerste keer kon ek dit wat in my kop was uitvoer en deurvoer en dit mooi noem.
Ek moes houtboksies afskuur met paint stripper bloot omdat ek nie NOG geld wou uitlê vir bemarking en props en wie weet wat alles nie. Ek het ‘n tafeldoek geleen. Ander goed uit my huis uit geneem. (Haai dit rym maar ek is nie besig met ‘n gedig nie). Nog goed gaan koop, en ‘n laaste ietsie weer gaan leen by iemand. Om te moes besluit HOEVEEL voorraad om te koop was nog ‘n taai toffie en tameletjie om deur te werk….
Ek het gedink, om die voorraad na te gaan, na ek dit gaan afhaal het, en te merk gaan vinnig gaan. Think again!! Dit het ure geneem en in die proses het ek BAIE geleer. Soos dat ek geld wil spaar vir ‘n klein barcode drukkertjie van ‘n aard. En maar tog my eie tafeldoeke wil laat maak, en ‘n pop waarop die voorskoot hang gaan koop. Om net ‘n paar te noem.
Ek het my day job, jy weet, die een wat die kos op die tafel sit, gedoen tussen alles deur en Donderdag voor die mark begin het, het ek 11 ure ingesit (in een dag ja) om daardie werk afgehandel te kry, voor ek myself die tyd gegun het om my website foto’s te neem van die nuwe voorraad en klaar voor te berei vir die Mark. Wat ‘n interessante aand was dit nie gewees nie. Min slaap, fliek kyk tussen merk en skryf deur, maar tog het ek dit, met die genade van God, gedoen en klaar gemaak.
Terwyl ek so by die mark sit en na al die mense kyk wat inkom, vang my oog die plakkaat wat ek gemaak het. Ek lees in Engels Flamingo’s are filter feeders…. ek gaan stop ‘n oomblik om te dink. Filtervoerders. Mmmm….dis interessant. Toe val dit in my gees soos wanneer jy ‘n muntstuk in ‘n spaarbussie gooi.
Die wêreld en alles om jou is vol GOED. Stuff, dinge. Sommige is goed vir jou en sommige is sleg vir jou. Die goed wat die lekkerste is, is nie noodwendig die beste vir jou nie. Maar ons moet mos soos flaminke wees. Ons moet FILTER wat ons inneem, sodat ons kan seker wees ons vere pienk word en so bly vir die Here. Ek gaan lees weer in die H.A.T. op – die betekenis van filter. Dit lui as volg: Toestel wat deur deursyging suiwer; suiweringstoestel, filtreerder. Wow. Dis vir ons om dit wat ons inneem, te suiwer. Die slegte uit te werp soos wat ‘n filter doen.
Wow. Die is vir my so ‘n interessante journey wat ek op is. Die Here openbaar alles stelselmatig vir my soos wat ek aangaan en die volgende tree blindelings gee om Hom te volg. Onvoorwaardelik. Met geloof soos ‘n kind. ‘n Mosterdsaadjie se geloof. Hoop op die onsienlike. Geanker in Hom sodat die winde van ongeloof my nie sal laat ronddobber soos golwe nie. Alles skriftuurlik.
I’m sold out….nananana Jesus….I’m SOLD OUT TO YOU!!! Dans die woorde weer in my kop. Die liedjie wat die Here vir my gegee het as die temalied vir alles – die hele Beroepsvrou ding. Ek luister hom gereeld maar tog onthou ek nie die woorde as ek nie die liedjie self hoor nie. Lang en kort is – ek is UITVERKOOP aan Jesus. Ek is soos die liedjie sê – ANDERS as ander mense. Geskape vir HIERDIE doel.
I ain’t like no one you’ve met before. I’m running for the front when they’re all running for the door. And I won’t sitdown, won’t back out, you can never shut me up, ’cause I’m on a mission and I won’t quit now. In a world full of followers, I’ll be a leader, in a world full of doubters, I’ll be a believer. I’m stepping out without a hesitation. Because the battle’s already been won. I’m sold out, I’m no longer living just for myself. Running after Jesus with my whole heart. And now I’m ready to show I am sold out, I’m sold out!!!
Ek moet omtrent myself keer om nie die hele liedjie hier te tik nie. Maar ek is seker jy verstaan wat ek probeer sê. Die liedjie PRAAT net met my gees. Ek kan nie anders as om Pienk Vere vir die Here te hê nie en vir mense te vertel van dit nie. Ek bid dat al die saad wat gesaai is deur gesprekke, water sal kry van die Heilige Gees af en sal groei en versprei wanneer die tyd reg is vir daardie mense. Dankie Here dat U MY gekies het vir die doel en mag ek ALTYD die Here se naam GROOT maak.
I first did this entry directly on Facebook, thinking it will only be a one liner that goes with this photo. It then turned out to be a chapter of some sort and I decided that I need to put this on my website for those who read my blog and who are not on Facebook.
I was looking for something on my phone when this photo popped up. I forgot I took it. Every time I think back to 2020 I feel like crying. It was probably the worst time ever for humanity. Driving around in what felt like a ghost town. Fearing the unknown and invisible virus. Wondering if you will catch it at the shops and bring it home to infect your loved ones.
Waiting in queues at shops to buy food, not being able to find everything you normally do. Being glared at by people when you buy both Corn Flakes AND All Bran, silently being labelled as a panic buyer, when in fact that is what your family consumes.
Every person on this earth was affected by the Pandemic. Everyone experienced trauma. Everyone needs to learn to cope with it and make peace with the fact that 2020 will be a part of your memories, whether you like it or not.
I do not ever want to have that time again. Lockdown was terrible. Having to homeschool and work (which I am still trying to catch up by the way – the work part). Trying to stay sane. Trying to catch my breath and just breathe. Trying myself, to work through massive trauma but trying to stay standing for my kids’ sake.
Not knowing what the future holds. The uncertainties. No wonder everyone suffers from anxiety or anything related to it. No one knows how to deal with it. How are we supposed to expect our kids to not have anxiety?
Before we judge anyone on anything now, two years later, just take a moment and think of their mental health and their trauma that they had to work through. Your trauma is not more traumatic than my trauma. Trauma is trauma and it affects us all.
I pray that God will take away these painful memories, the tears that often want to well up in my eyes as I feel the change of season and being reminded of 2 years ago, even if I did not willfully want to remember it. Thank God that I can call myself His child.
Because of the Pandemic my blog and new business came into existence (all unplanned but out of His hand). God used the bad and made it good and better. May we stop focusing on the MINORITY of bad and focus on the MAJORITY of good.
I pray that my children are not permanently scarred. I did not always act like a mother during that time. We all had our moments. I did not know how to deal with it. I expected my kids to just go on and do their school work like they are not affected by this thing.
I am sure my heart will still ache and tears will still come to my eyes this time of the year, for a few years to come. But one day I will get up and that will be a thing of the past.
Thank you God for protecting us, keeping us safe, for providing for us in spite of a very difficult economy. All the glory be to God always! Thank you that one day, soon and in the near future, the change of season will not affect my emotions like it is currently affected. Thank you that we will be able to function as “normal” as we possibly can, living with the unseen virus.
Ek het eers die inskrywing direk op Facebook gedoen, gedink dit sal ‘n one liner wees wat saam met die foto gaan. Dit het toe uitgedraai om ‘n hoofstuk te wees van een of ander aard en ek het toe besluit dat ek die op my webblad moet sit vir die gehoor wat nie op Facebook is nie.
Ek het vir iets gesoek op my foon, toe díe foto opkom. Ek het vergeet ek het dit geneem. Elke keer as ek terug dink aan 2020, voel ek lus om te huil. Dit was seker een van die ergste tye ooit vir die mensdom. Om rond te ry in wat gevoel het soos ‘n spook dorp. Vrees vir die onbekende en ongesiende virus. Die onsekerheid of jy die virus in die winkels sal optel en huis toe bring na jou geliefdes toe.
Die gewag in rye buite die winkels om kos te koop, die sukkel om goed in die hande te kry wat jy normaalweg koop. Die aangluur van ander as jy durf waag om ‘n beide ‘n pak Corn Flakes EN All Bran te koop, daar waar jy stilweg deur hul gemerk word as ‘n panic buyer, wanneer dit eintlik iets is wat jou gesin normaalweg gebruik.
Elke persoon op hierdie aarde was deur die Pandemie geaffekteer. Almal moet leer cope met dit en 2020 gaan deel van ons memories (ek kan nou nie die Afrikaanse woord onthou vir memories nie) wees vir altyd, of ons nou daarvan hou of nie.
Ek wil nooit weer in my lewe daardie tyd hê nie. Lockdown was aaklig. Om te moes homeschool en werk (iets wat ek steeds probeer opvang net so tussen ons – die werk gedeelte). Om te probeer sane bly. Om my asem te probeer terug kry en net asem te haal. Om self te probeer werk deur massiewe trauma maar terselfde tyd staande te bly vir my kinders se onthalwe.
Nie weet wat die toekoms in hou nie. Die onsekerheid. Geen wonder amper almal sukkel met angs of enige iets verwant aan dit nie. Niemand weet hoe om daarmee te deal nie. Hoe is ons veronderstel om te verwag dat ons kinders nie angs het nie?
Voor ons enige iemand oordeel, twee jaar later, vat net ‘n oomblik en dink aan hul mental health en hulle trauma waardeur hulle moet werk. Jou trauma is nie meer traumaties as my trauma nie. Trauma is trauma en dit affekteer ons almal.
Ek bid dat God genesing sal bring vir hierdie pynvolle herinneringe (uiteindelik kom ek op die Afrikaanse woord vir memories), die trane wat gereeld wil opdam in my oë as ek voel hoe die seisoen verander, dit alles terwyl ek onwillekeurig aan 2 jaar terug herinner word, al is dit nie doelbewus nie. Dank die Here ek kan myself Sy kind noem.
As gevolg van die Pandemie het my webjoernaal en nuwe besigheid / bediening tot stand gekom (alles onbepland maar uit Sy hand). God het die sleg gebruik en dit goed en beter gemaak. Mag ons ophou fokus op die MINDERHEID van slegte dinge en fokus op die MEERDERHEID van goeie dinge.
Ek bid dat my kinders nie permanente skade het nie. Ek het nie altyd soos ‘n ma opgetree in daardie tyd nie (nou nog soms ook). Ons almal het ons oomblikke. Ek het nie geweet hoe om daarmee te deal nie. Ek het van my kinders verwag om aan te gaan met hul skool werk asof hulle glad nie geaffekteer word deur die ding nie.
Ek is seker my hart sal steeds pyn en die trane gaan ook in my oë kom die tyd van die jaar. Vir nog ‘n paar jaar gaan dit so wees. Maar eendag gaan ek opstaan en dit gaan ‘n ding van die verlede wees.
Dankie Here vir U beskerming, dat U ons veilig hou en vir ons voorsien ten spyte van ‘n baie moeilike ekonomiese omstandighede. Al die eer aan die Here altyd! Dankie dat eendag, gou en in die nabye toekoms, dat die verandering van seisoen my emosies nie meer gaan affekteer soos dit tans doen nie. Dankie dat ons gou weer soos “normaal” as wat ons moontlik kan, leef met die onsigbare virus.
My word! I have been doing daily journaling entries like mad! Trying to catch up the lost time since September. Guess what? Life is busy happening while I try doing this, so my plan seems to be full of flaws…
Again I almost had a panic attack (this feels like it happens on a daily basis for the silliest things) about this training and HOW am I going to catch up on this??? I only have access for 12 months and my time is almost up….
Just as I was about to take out the brown paperbag to regulate my heavy and uneven breathing, I feel the Holy Spirit calm me down like only He can do. There is nothing that I can compare His calmness to….not Lavender, white noise or any other thing that has a calming, soothing effect.
My thoughts and anxiety and all the other emotions come to a screetching halt. You know, like when you were driving like a crazy person and saw the huge speed hump almost to late? Like that!
I felt Him drop into my spirit that I do not have to have all the journaling entries done at the same time, writing out a week’s journal prompts in 15 minutes. The purpose of this is, after all, to let you grow as a person. So no one is going to experience true growth if everything is rushed!! The journaling is a process that has to be done bit by bit and not necessarily in chunks like I am trying to do.
I sit back for a moment and think, true that! High five, fist pump and booty shake with the Holy Spirit for that revelation. But then I ask Him “So HOW am I supposed to catch up on the lost time?” His answer is simple. “Download the content that is currently available, work through the video’s and other material and do the online assessment.”
He continues: “That should do it. The journaling is a process and a journey you are on, you are not supposed to rush that.The online assessments are like all other training. You can do many shortly after another. You will be storing the knowledge for use later.“
I have not tried this yet and perhaps that should be my plan of action? To do it like that? I think it is time for watching videos and reading the material, while walking on the treadmill and then doing the assessments….
Oh my hat!! Ek het my daaglikse joernaal inskrywings gedoen soos ek weet nie wat nie! Probeer opvang op verlore tyd sedert September. Raai wat? Die lewe is besig om te gebeur terwyl ek dit probeer doen, so my plan voel of hy propvol foute is….en nie deurgevoer kan word nie...
Weereens het ek amper ‘n panic attack (dit voel deesdae of dit daagliks gebeur vir die simpelste goed) oor hierdie opleiding en HOE ek veronderstel is om dit op te vang??? Ek het net toegang vir 12 maande en die tyd is amper op….
Net soos ek bruinpapiersak wil gryp om my asemhaling te reguleer, voel ek die Heilige Gees my kalmeer soos net Hy kan doen. Daar is niks waarmee ek Sy kalmte mee kan vergelyk nie….nie Laventel (hoe is daai vir ‘n properse Afrikaanse woord?), white noise of enige ander ding wat kalmerend is nie.
My gedagtes en angs asook honderd en tien ander emosies kom tot ‘n skreeuende stilstand. Jy weet, soos wanneer jy soos ‘n mal mens bestuur (kom nou – ons almal doen dit soms…) en skielik ‘n groot spoedhobbel amper te laat sien. Net so!
Ek voel hoe Hy in my gees laat val dat ek nie al die joernaalinskrywings op dieselfde tyd hoef te doen nie. Ek hoef nie te probeer om ‘n week se joernaalinskrywings in 15 minute te doen nie. Die doel van dit is mos om jou as ‘n persoon te laat groei. So niemand gaan ware groei ervaar as alles afgerammel word nie!! Die joernaalinskrywings is ‘n proses wat bietjie vir bietjie gedoen moet word en hoef nie noodwendig in groot hompe gedoen te word soos wat ek nou probeer doen nie.
Ek sit terug en dink vir ‘n oomblik en besluit true that! High five, fist pump en booty shake met die Heilige Gees vir daardie openbaring. Maar dan vra ek Hom so HOE is ek veronderstel om op te vang op verlore tyd? Sy antwoord is eenvoudig. “Laai die inhoud af wat tans beskikbaar is, werk deur die video’s en ander materiaal en doen die aanlyn assesserings.”
Hy gaan voort: “Dit behoort dit te doen. Die joernaalinskrywings is ‘n proses en ‘n reis wat jy op is, jy is nie veronderstel om deur dit te jaag nie. Die aanlyn klasse en asseserings is soos alle ander opleiding. Jy kan baie na mekaar doen. Jy gaan die kennis stoor vir latere gebruik.”
Ek het nog nie dit probeer nie en miskien moet dit my plan van aksie word? Om dit so te doen? Ek dink dis weer tyd om videos te kyk en materiaal te lees terwyl ek op die treadmill loop en dan die assesserings aan te pak….
I thought it was a good idea to start writing the closing chapter. The days fly past and the weeks even faster, I do not want to be caught off guard and out of time, not writing the final chapter before end of March.
When I started writing this chapter, there were two weeks left in March. Now it is basically one week (ok less than one week). I still wonder on a daily basis, why the time goes by so quickly and if God is shortening our time because we are in the Oppression times that the bible talks about?
Back to the song. The devil is still trying to steal my song and he thinks he is going to get it right. But, it is actually hillarious to me when things start to feel upside down for me, the way that it is sometimes, because then I KNOW that I am on the right path and that this ís what God wants me to do.
My heart is still singing different songs for God, all that other artists have written, and it is as if I cannot sing His praises enough. After all, He gave me life and the breath that I breathe, so I cannot do anything less than to sing His praises, can I?
Every so often, it feels as if my heart and spirit wants to sing its own song to God. I truly hope that His ears are not sensitive to off-tune songs (oh my word is off-tune even a word? I am sure you understand what I am saying here, in Afrikaans we call it vals sing – not quite keeping to the tune). In my opinion, my physical person does not sing very beautifully at all (even if I was selected for the school choir and revue’s AND even landed up in a recording studio to record songs – I often wonder if the teacher that chose me just liked me or did she really see the potential in my singing abilities?).
Anyway, I laugh at the thought of how I sound in God’s ears when I sing and whether He will like it; whether it will be on the right tune or not, and whether any of these factors have an influence over His liking it or not? I don’t think I have to sing perfectly for Him to appreciate it?
We are all imperfect humans, are we not? If this was the case (perfect singing) then everything in our lives must be perfect before He will accept us, and that is surely a lie!! God takes us as we are, broken and full of mistakes. As long as we accept HIM and His son is declared as our Saviour in our lives, then we are on the right track. And of course we have to live like this daily and strive to be holy like Jesus (and stop sinning the same sins over and over).
My song will always praise God. Especially now in March (a very busy March for me) as I reflect on what happened the past year i.t.o. my blog. How I have grown, how God has just added and keeps on adding. I am so grateful that I was able to celebrate the first birthday on 23 March 2022. Grateful for the knowledge that He instilled in me and still does.
The wisdom that He gives me and people that He lets my path cross with, just to make everything even better for the purpose for which He has created this. What is your song? Do you have a song? It does not matter if you can sing or not and whether you can write or not. You must still SING for God! Does the devil try to steal your song? If that is the case, then you should be jumping for joy, because that means that you are on the right road!
I want to close off with a few songs that are on my heart, songs that I sing to God over and over. Songs that I search frequently on Spotify, while I am doing my day job AND preparing for the Easter Market that lies ahead…for those of you that is close enough, come and visit me at my table 1 to 4 April 2022 at Gerber Plaaskombuis in Skeerpoort. The first 7 purchasers each day will receive a free gift…
And just a last little thing to close off completely – I include my first two entries (in Afrikaans – sorry hope Google translate will work for you) of my blog as short cut links on this entry. Just so that we all can see where I was and where the blog is now – all the glory to God!
Ek het dit goed gedink om maar die slot hoofstuk te skryf. Die dae snel verby en die weke nog vinniger en ek wil nie dat die tyd my vang en dan het ek nie geleentheid gehad om die slot hoofstuk te skryf voor einde Maart nie.
Toe ek die stuk begin skryf het was daar nog twee weke van Maart oor. Nou is dit basies een week (ok minder as ‘n week). Ek wonder elke dag steeds hoekom die tyd so vinnig vlieg en of die Here ons tyd verkort hier omdat ons in die Verdrukkingstyd is?
Terug by die lied. Die ou duiwel probeer steeds my lied steel, en hy dink hy gaan reg kom. Maar, dis eintlik vir my skreeu snaaks as dinge so deurmekaar is soos wat dit soms is by ons, want dan WEET ek net dat ek op die regte pad is en dat díe is wat die Here wil hê ek moet doen.
My hart sing steeds verskeie liedere vir die Here, alles wat ander kunstenaars geskryf en getoonset het (is dit ooit ‘n woord wonder ek?) en dis asof ek nie genoeg Sy lof kan besing nie. Hy het, after all, die asem in my liggaam geblaas, so ek kan nie iets minder doen as om Hom te besing nie kan ek?
Dit voel hier en daar of my hart en gees ‘n eie lied vir die Here wil sing. Ek hoop maar Sy ore is nie toonhoogte sensitief nie, want my fisiese mens kan nou nie mooi sing in my opinie nie (al was ek in die skoolkoor en revue’s EN in ‘n studio om liedjies op te neem – wonder ek maar steeds of die juffrou my net gelike het en of het sy regtig potensiaal gesien in my sang vermoë?).
Elkgeval, ek giggel maar as ek dink aan hoe ek vir myself klink as ek sing; en hoe dit in God se ore moet klink; en of Hy daarvan hou; en of alles mooi op die regte toonhoogte moet wees of nie, vir Hom, voor Hy daarvan sal hou nie? Ek dink darem nie ek hoef perfek te sing vir Hom om dit te waardeer nie?
Ons is dan almal mense wat nie perfek is nie. As dit die geval was (perfekte sang) dan moet alles in ons lewens seker perfek wees voor Hy ons sal aanvaar, en dis vir seker ‘n leuen!! Die Here vat ons soos ons is, stukkend en propvol foute. Solank ons HOM aanvaar en Sy seun as Verlosser verklaar het oor ons lewens, is ons op die regte pad.En natuurlik moet ons dit uitleef elke dag ook en streef na heiligmaking (en minder dieselfde sondes doen oor en oor).
My lied sal altyd God se lof besing. Veral nou in Maart (‘n baie besige Maart vir my) as ek terugkyk na wat die afgelope jaar gebeur het i.t.v. my blog. Hoe ek gegroei het, hoe die Here net bygevoeg het en steeds byvoeg. Ek is so bitter dankbaar dat ek die eerste verjaarsdag kon vier op 23 Maart 2022. Dankbaar vir al die kennis wat die Here in my ingesit het en steeds doen.
Die wysheid wat Hy my gee en die mense wat Hy oor my pad stuur, net om alles nóg beter te maak vir Sy doel waarvoor Hy dit geskep het. Wat is jou lied? Het jy ‘n lied? Dit maak nie saak of jy kan sing of nie en of jy kan skryf of nie. Jy moet steeds SING vir die Here! Probeer die duiwel jou lied steel? As dit die geval is moet jy op en af spring van opgewondenheid, want dit beteken jy is op die regte pad!
Ek wil afsluit met ‘n paar liedjies wat op my hart is, wat ek oor en oor vir die Here sing. Liedjies wat ek kort-kort gaan soek en speel op Spotify, so terwyl ek my day job doen EN voorberei vir die Paasmark wat voorlê…vir die wat naby genoeg is, kom kuier by my stalletjie 1 tot 4 April 2022 by Gerber Plaaskombuis op Skeerpoort. Die eerste 7 aankopers elke dag sal ‘n gratis geskenkie ontvang…
En net so laaste dingetjie om heeltemal mee af te sluit – ek sluit my eerste twee blog inskrywings ook in as kort-pad skakels op die inskrywing. Net sodat ons almal kan sien waar ek was en waar die blog nou is – alle eer aan God!
Monday 14 March 2022 marks the second day that I had the privilege to hand out aprons and tell students more about the Pink Feathers and what it symbolizes. That morning I was awake at 3 am. It was probably the excitement or nerves (or both) for what was lying ahead for the day.
I had an appointment at a local school, Bekker High School, to have a 15 minute chat with the Home Economics (I have no idea what they call this subject in English these days) students, all in grade 12. I saw each class individually, which probably helped ease me into public speaking….as I have not done this for a very long time.
I think the last time I had to talk in front of people was our wedding and before that I was in grade 12.I am not counting the appointment in January I had at another local school, HaMaKom Private School. I was so nervous there I could not remember WHAT I said that day but pretty much told the same story that I told at Bekker.
Anyway, back to my original story. The first speech went well, I seemed to have the attention of all the students, remembered everything I felt that God laid on my heart. As the day progressed, the order of the speech changed slightly but the core message stayed the same.
The Home Economics teacher, Marié Booyse, added to what I said by saying that the aprons provide you protection. Not only physical (food stains on your clothes) but also spiritual protection. That was so trueand another revelation to the meaning of the apron.
As the week progressed, I kept on thinking about what was said on Monday, it is as if God dropped it into my spirit that the protection is similar to the Breastplate of Righteousness that Paul writes about in Ephesians 6.
That was very striking to me, as that is what I stand for. Trying to be righteous and ethical always, even when no one is watching. I further had a discussion with my sister from another mister Dora (my domestic worker if you were wondering). She saw the things that I was preparing for the Easter Market that I will be attending as a Vendor (early April), selling my items and making myself available to chat and tell people about that which God has laid on my heart to say.
Ok, back to the discussion with Dora. On the printouts that will be on display at my table at the market, I had some fun facts from my son’s facts book that I retyped for this purpose. One of them was (and this is the question I asked the students on Monday) Did you know that Flamingos are pink due to what they eat?
She told me that this made her think even more about the whole Pink Feathers range and that the Holy Spirit is working with her the whole time about this. Thoughts I left with the students on Monday was – what are we doing to make ourselves reflect pink to the world? Dora and I, then further had a discussion about what we are filling ourselves up with, reading, listening and eating(also something that I told the students on Monday).
The conversation then turned to, what I like to call, empty calories. In my conversations at Bekker I referred to eating too much sugar that will make you crash the whole time. All my friends know that I like to refer to chips, biscuits and chocolates as empty calories. Things that are jam packed with calories (which make us fat by the way) but lacks nutritional value to feed our bodies and build them up to be what they should be, as God intended.
Again this revelation came that we must fill our spirits and minds with things that are not empty calories spiritually. What are you watching, reading and listening to? If you binge read, watch and listen to something that is empty then you will remain empty and will not produce Pink Feathers and reflect pink for God to the world.The same is true for eating by the way, but that we all know…
After my discussions and handouts to the students, it was photo time. The kids seemed very chuffed with their gifts and I truly hope that everytime they wear those aprons, not only in grade 12, but also after they finish school, that they will remember what it stands for and symbolizes.
All the glory be to God always! He inspired the aprons, He gave me the vision and the people to produce an electronic logo and the apron. Without Him none of this would have been possible. I just know deep down in my heart, there is so much more to these aprons than just an apron….like we have already discovered and may still discover.
Just as I was closing off this blog entry, I read the scripture verse that forms part of my logo again. Proverbs 10:21. The lips of the righteous feed many: But fools die for want of wisdom. (KJV). Wow is all I can say….this ties in to the latest revelation of the aprons, what you are feeding your body, soul and spirit with and what Beroepsvrou stands for. All the glory be to God always!
Maandag 14 Maart 2022 merk die tweede dag wat ek die voorreg gehad het om voorskote uit te deel en studente meer te vertel van die Pienk Vere en wat dit simboliseer. Daardie oggend was ek al 3 uur wakker. Dit was seker opgewondenheid of senuwees (of beide) vir dit wat voorgelê het vir die dag.
Ek het ‘n afspraak by ‘n plaaslike skool, Hoërskool Bekker, gehad om ‘n 15 minute gesprek te hê met die Huishoudkunde (ek weet nou dit word deesdae Verbruikerstudies genoem) studente, almal in graad 12. Ek het elke klas individueel gesien, wat my seker gehelp het om gewoond te raak aan public speaking want ek het dit lank laas gedoen.
Ek dink die laaste keer wat ek moes praat voor mense was by ons troue en voor dit toe ek in Graad 12 was. Ek tel nou glad nie die afspraak wat ek in Januarie, by ‘n ander plaaslike skool, HaMaKom Privaatskool gehad het nie. Ek was so op my senuwees daar, ek kon glad nie onthou WAT ek gesê het daardie dag nie, maar ek het min of meer dieselfde storie vertel wat ek by Bekker vertel het.
Elkgeval, terug by my oorspronklike storie. Die eerste toespraak het goed gegaan. Dit het gelyk of ek almal se aandag gehad het en alles onthou het wat die Here op my hart gelê het. Soos wat die dag aangegaan het, het die volgorde van die toespraak effe verander, maar die kern van die boodskap het dieselfde gebly.
Die Verbruikerstudie juffrou, Marié Booyse, het bygevoeg tot dit wat ek gesê het, deur te sê dat die voorskote vir jou ook beskerming gee. Nie net fisiese (kos en olie kolle op jou klere) beskerming nie, maar ook geestelike beskerming. Dit was so waar en nog ‘n openbaring oor die betekenis van die voorskoot.
Soos wat die week aangegaan het, het ek aanhou dink oor wat Maandag gesê was. Dit is asof die Here dit in my gees laat val het dat die beskerming soortgelyk is aan die Borsharnas van Geregtigheid waaroor Paulus skryf in Efesiërs 6.
Dit was baie treffend vir my, want dit is waarvoor ek staan. Om te probeer regverdig (hier klink righteous net beter maar toemaar) en eties te wees, altyd, selfs wanneer niemand kyk nie. Ek het verder ook ‘n gesprek met my sister from another mister Dora (my huishulp as jy gewonder het). Sy het die goedjies gesien wat ek besig is om voor te berei vir die Paasmark wat ek gaan bywoon as ‘n Verkoper (begin April), waar ek my items gaan verkoop en myself beskikbaar gaan stel om te gesels en met mense te praat oor dit wat die Here op my hart lê om te sê.
Ok, so terug na die gesprek met Dora. Op die drukstukke wat ten toon gestel gaan word op my tafel by die mark, het ek ‘n paar vinnige feite van my seun se feiteboek oorgetik vir hierdie doel. Een van hulle was (en dis die vraag wat ek die studente gevra het Maandag) Het jy geweet dat Flaminke pienk is as gevolg van dit wat hulle eet?
Sy het my vertel dat dit haar nog meer laat dink het oor die hele Pienk Vere reeks en dat die Heilige Gees met haar werk die heeltyd oor dit. Gedagtes wat ek by die studente gelos het Maandag was – wat doen ons om onsself pienk te laat vertoon vir die wêreld? Ek en Dora het toe verder ‘n gesprek gehad oor waarmee ons onsself opvul deur te kyk, lees, luister en eet (ook iets wat ek die studente vertel het Maandag).
Die gesprek het toe gedraai na wat ek van hou om te verwys as, leë kalorieë (liewe aarde – ek ken nie my spelreëls so goed om te weet of hierdie woord een of twee e‘s in het nie…so verskoon maar die wat taalkundig is en weet…). In my gesprekke by Bekker, het ek verwys na wanneer mens te veel suiker eet en dan die heeltyd crash (die woord verduidelik net die impak van suiker vir my beter). Al my vriendinne weet ek hou daarvan om na skyfies, koekies en sjokolades te verwys as leë kalorieë. Goed wat propvol kalorieë is (wat ons vet maak net so tussen ons) maar wat voedingswaarde ontbreek om ons liggame te voed en op te bou na wat dit moet wees, soos God dit bestem het.
Weer was hierdie ‘n openbaring dat ons moet seker maak dat ons ons gees en gedagtes vul met goed wat nie leë kalorieë is nie. Waarna kyk, lees en luister jy? As jy binge (wat sou die Afrikaanse woord vir dit wees?) kyk, lees en luister na iets wat leeg is, gaan jy leeg bly en sal jy nie Pienk Vere kan produseer om die wêreld te wys dat jy ‘n kind van God is nie. Dieselfde is waar vir eet net so tussen ons, maar dit weet ons almal….
Na my gesprekke en oorhandigings aan die studente, was dit tyd vir foto’s. Die kinders het baie in hul noppies voorgekom oor hul geskenke en ek vertrou regtig dat, elke keer wanneer hulle die voorskote dra, nie net in graad 12 nie, maar ook wanneer hul klaar is met skool, dat hulle sal onthou waarvoor dit staan en simboliseer.
Al die eer aan God altyd!! Hy het die inspirasie gegee vir die voorskote, die visie aan my toevertrou asook die mense om die elektroniese logo te kan produseer en die voorskote. Sonder Hom sou niks van hierdie moontlik gewees het nie. Ek weet net diep binne in my hart, dat daar soveel meer aan die voorskote is as net ‘n voorskoot….soos ons reeds ontdek het en steeds gaan ontdek.
Net soos wat ek die inskrywing afsluit, besluit ek om die skrifvers wat deel vorm van my logo weer te gaan lees. Spreuke 10:21 Die lippe van die regverdige help baie mense reg; maar die dwase sterf deur gebrek aan verstand. Die engels stel dit so mooi en ek sit dit ook in, want toe ek die inskrywing begin het, het ek díe keer eerste in Engels getik en nie Afrikaans soos ek normaal weg doen nie. Dit was in Engels wat ek die openbaring gekry het. The lips of the righteous feed many: But fools die for want of wisdom. (KJV). Wow is al wat ek kan sê….hierdie sluit so aan by die nuutste openbaring oor die voorskote, wat jy jou liggaam, siel en gees voed en waarvoor Beroepsvrou staan. Al die eer aan God altyd!
Sometimes I wonder about Mary. How did she feel after she heard that she was expecting the Messiah? You see, the Bible does not tell us about her emotions. Not everything. We do know that she sung a song and was excited about that which God called her for.
But…was she shocked before the song? Did she feel rejected by people? What did they say about her and what did they think about her? Did they discuss her like we, as people, like to do quite so often? Did she also lie awake at night? Sleeping for only 3 hours and then being awake the rest of the time while everyone around her is snoring away?
I don’t think it was easy for her. Similar to situations we find ourselves in at times. You see, perhaps you have a song in your heart about what God has planned for you and spoke to you over your life. But in other aspects of your life there is not necessarily a song in your heart.
I think sometimes God wants us to be impulsive for Him. To do things without overthinking it, something I do often. Just trust Him. Even if life presses hard on other levels, when I feel like I cannot breathe and cannot sleep at night. Even when the devil every so often tries to steal my song….I must stay impulsive for Him.
The song that God has laid on my heart for a while now, is Rooftops by Kim Walker-Smith. I feel I want to stand on the rooftops and just shout out His name and proclaim it over my life. Irrespective of the work requirements and work pressure. Irrespective of the fact that the devil tries to kill my song with things that happen from everyday life.
I shout out Your Name, from the rooftops I proclaim, I am Yours! I hear the words echo through my thoughts. I sing it even louder to mute the lies the devil is trying to tell me in my mind. I did not write my own personal song like Mary, but this one is close enough to something for ME. What is YOUR song that God placed on your heart? Do you sing it or do you allow the difficulties of life (let us be honest here – nothing these days are easy any more) to suppress your song and smother it?
What do you choose today? I choose to still sing and believe that God trusted Beroepsvrou and everything that goes with it, to me. This is what HE planned for my life. He did not plan for me to lie awake night after night, worrying about how I am going to get everything done work wise. Or that I lie and worry about our outstanding debtors and outstanding debts.
Surely there will always be someone that owes you money and you will surely owe someone money. You will probably never have enough money for everything. Or enough time for everything. The work that I do, will surely not become easier and the deadlines will certainly (not maybe or perhaps) remain. Will one ever have enough patience with your children? Will you ever not have days that you will feel despaired about HOW you are going to help your child through Grade 7?
At the end of the day, God IS and STAYS in CONTROL of EVERYTHING. We do not have control over anything else except our own actions and outlook on life. Why not do this with a song on your lips and in your heart? From the rooftops I proclaim, I am YOURS!!!!! I sing, amplified and on the loudest volume in my thoughts, just to be sure that the devil HEARS me.
Ek wonder soms oor Maria. Hoe het sy gevoel nadat sy uitgevind het sy verwag die Messias? Jy sien, die Bybel vertel ons nie van haar emosies nie. Nie alles nie. Ons weet sy het ‘n lied gesing en was opgewonde oor dit waarvoor die Here haar gekies het.
Maar…was sy geskok voor die lied? Het sy verwerp gevoel deur die mense? Wat het hulle van haar gesê en gedink? Het hulle haar bespreek soos ons mense alte graag doen? Het sy ook wakker gelê in die nag? Geslaap vir net 3 ure en dan is sy wakker vir die res van die tyd terwyl almal om haar heerlik lê en snork?
Ek dink nie dit was maklik vir haar nie. Soortgelyk aan situasies waarin ons, onsself soms bevind. Jy sien, jy het dalk hierdie lied in jou hart oor dit wat die Here vir jou beplan en oor jou lewe gespreek het. Maar in ander opsigte en aspekte van jou lewe is daar nie noodwendig ‘n lied nie.
Ek dink soms wil die Here hê ons moet impulsief vir Hom wees. Goed doen net sonder om dit te overthink soos wat ek alte graag doen. Hom net vertrou. Al druk die lewe op alle ander vlakke dat ek voel ek kry nie asem nie en kan nie slaap snags nie. Al probeer die duiwel gereeld my lied steel…ek moet impulsief bly vir Hom.
Die lied wat die Here weer vir ‘n ruk al in my hart gesit het is Rooftops deur Kim Walker-Smith. Ek voel ek wil op die dakke staan en Sy naam uitroep, proklameer oor my lewe. Ongeag die werksvereistes en werksdruk. Ongeag die feit dat die duiwel die lied probeer smoor met alledaagse dinge in die lewe.
I shout out Your Name, from the rooftops I proclaim, I am Yours! Eggo die woorde deur my gedagtes. Ek sing dit sommer harder om die leuens wat die duiwel vir my in my kop vertel te probeer uitdoof. Ek het nou nie my eie persoonlike lied geskryf soos Maria nie, maar die een is vir my nagenoeg aan iets vir MY. Wat is JOU lied wat die Here in jou hart gesit het? Sing jy hom of laat jy toe dat die lewe se moeilik (kom ons wees eerlik, niks is meer maklik deesdae nie) jou liedjie onderdruk en versmoor?
Wat kies jy vandag? Ek kies om steeds te sing en te glo dat die Here Beroepsvrou en alles wat met dit saam gaan aan my toevertrou het. Dis wat HY vir my lewe beplan het. Hy het nie beplan vir my om nagte om wakker te lê en te bekommer hoe ek alles werksgewys gaan doen nie. Of dat ek lê en bekommer oor ons uitstaande debiteure en ons uitstaande skuld nie.
Daar gaan altyd seker maar iemand wees wat jou geld skuld en jy gaan seker altyd iemand anders geld skuld. Jy gaan seker nooit genoeg geld hê vir alles nie. Of genoeg tyd vir als nie. Die werk in ons bedryf gaan seker nooit makliker word nie en die deadlines gaan vir seker (nie net seker nie) daar bly. Gaan mens ooit genoeg geduld hê met jou kinders? Gaan jy ooit nie dae hê wat jy moedeloos voel as jy nie weet HOE jy jou kind gaan help deur Graad 7 nie?
Op die ou einde van die dag IS en BLY God in BEHEER van ALLES. Ons het nie beheer oor enige iets behalwe ons eie optrede en uitkyk oor die lewe nie. Hoekom dan nou nie dit maar met ‘n lied in die hart doen nie? From the rooftops I proclaim, I am YOURS!!!!! Sing ek sommer amplified en op sy hardste in my gedagtes, net om seker te maak die duiwel HOOR my.
Just yesterday morning, as I was getting ready for the day ahead in our bathroom, I noticed the bath in our bathroom. I see the stickeez on the side of the bath, used to pull out the plug (purely because we have not had time to fix the mechanism that has broken). Then my eyes wander further and I see a lost sponge number (nogal number 7), that the kids always play with when they bath, pushed into the shelf above the bath.
But it is as if the stickeez and the sponge number have teamed up against me, mocking me. They are mocking me by accentuating the empty bath, the bath that, every now and then, has a few bugs in and a layer of dust due to little or no use. Then it is as if they stab my heart with a knife, twisting it. The pain shoots through my whole body when I realise – the children are now almost grown up.
Gone are the days sitting next to the bath, playing, teaching numbers, alphabet letters and colors. Gone are the moments that, at times felt too long and torturous (God knows my heart and EVERY mother feels like this at times, that I am confident of!). These moments felt that way, especially when I got very little sleep due to breastfeeding through the night, or long hours of work (or both). It was not the children’s fault that I felt like that, yet some days, the moments that I had to treasure, (especially when I was very tired and slept badly) where too much for me to handle.
Earlier this week I had a conversation with a friend. She tells me that someone told her that they only have 7 Christmases (this spelling looks wrong but I am leaving it here because I have no idea how else to spell it) left with her eldest living with them in the house, then that time is over. I look at her in total disbelief, as if she is lying to me. I then start to think, doing some calculations myself. I have less than that left with my eldest child!! When I have months, weeks and weekends like we have had since January right up to now in March, when I slave away behind my computer (what feels like days without end) just to get things submitted on time and to get through the work load, then deep inside of me, there is this rebellion that builds up against my work. (My goodness WHAT a LONG sentence, but I do not think I can break it up more?).
I feel more than angry, because I feel that my work steals from me and my children. To top it all off, sometimes the working, days without end, week in and week out, working on weekends, is not even rewarded with a payment. Many clients (not only one) just shine like a bright little star not paying our accounts, even though they receive the statement, which is sent very patiently and politely month after month. Unfortunately Pastel does not have that little man that is on his knees, crying with the words Please pay, overdue that you can insert on the statement. Not like the old days, where an admin tannie (aunty if you are wondering) prints out the statements, stamping them with Mr. Please Pay Overdue, folding it neatly and then posting it. No, now it is just very convenient and easy to leave e-mails as unread.
But there I am losing my plot again about what I actually want to say. You see, this rebellion actually starts to create bitterness and bitterness makes you ill and tired. It wastes so much precious energy. So back to the empty bath. I think about it the whole day while driving to Johannesburg to see a client, and back again. I wonder by myself just WHY God made me aware of the bath?
Then I start to think, when last DID the kids bath in our bath? Somewhere between last year and this year, they started showering in their own bathroom. In the beginning it was nice to have my bathroom back to myself (and my husband of course). No toys lying all over the show. But suddenly I realise that it is over for ever, the toys lying all over the show. That which was the biggest irritation to me at times (not always) is now gone and that implies that the kids are growing up and are moving into a new phase.
I also think back to a conversation I had with another friend (also earlier this week, and YES I talk alot!). She tells me that her eldest is at University. Again I stare at her in total disbelief (and again as if she too, is lying to me). She is only 42, how can she have a child at University? Then I realise she is right. He is 18 already! She tells me that I must enjoy the time I still have to sleep and lie next to the kids at night. I must tolerate it, bear it. When you see again, it is over.
With tears in my eyes I realise that at least I only have an empty bath. She has 3 things that are empty – a bath, a bed and a room. I feel the Holy Spirit working on my heart, gently removing the knife that was turned and twisted. The reality of the empty bath does not hurt less. But He reminds me that I still have 2 of the 3 items in my house. “Treasure it” I feel the whispering in my spirit. “Have more patience and just trust me with the work and everything that bothers you so much” He continues to tell me.
“Leave everything at the feet of Jesus” words that I keep on repeating to myself and which I also hear other people say to me and I, myself, even utter to people that are feeling discouraged. “It is HARD God!” I almost want to shout back to Him. “Everyone expects something from me, every moment of every day. I am just ONE person. By the time that the kids arrive home in the afternoons, I am finished.” (In Afrikaans we say ‘op soos ou brood’ but a direct translation of this just does not sound right). “Where do you scratch out some patience? I don’t even have crumbs to spare? Plus my kids deserve more than just crumbs.” I continue reasoning with God. As if He knows NOTHING that is going on in my life.
I remain silent for a moment and see the bath again. The bath that is empty. Then I see the rooms that are full and the beds that we share every evening with our kids. I know it is ok to do it in this manner. Even if it is frowned upon by other people, I know it is ok for us. This is the little bit that we can give back to our kids for all the nights, weekends, holidays, days, weeks, months that we had to work, missing out on time with them, not being able to assist with studying and tasks that have to be done, the list is LOOONG. For all the ungrateful work that we have ever done for people. For all the unpaid statements, without Mr. Please Pay Overdue on.
I feel a calmness coming over me and I know, God knows my heart. I am doing the best that I can with that which I have available to me. My best will probably never be good enough in my own eyes, because I have this expectation, an expectation about how life should be. Not how life really is. I truly hope that my best is good enough for my kids.
I then also leave my unpaid accounts, without Mr. Please Pay Overdue on at the feet of Jesus, with my work and the pressure that comes with it, together with, what feels like 10 million other things. I hear an echo through my mind – I need only to be still, for the Lord will fight the fight for me. God is fighting, even if it does not feel like that. Exodus 14:14 (KJV) The LORD shall fight for you, and ye shall hold your peace. I place the last little piece of something at Jesus’ feet – the empty bath. Then I turn around in search of crumbs, scraping them together so that my kids can experience more than just crumbs from this afternoon and every other afternoon and evening from now on.
Net gister oggend staan ek in ons badkamer, besig om reg te maak vir die dag wat voorlê, toe my oog die bad in ons badkamer vang. Ek merk die stickeez op wat langs die bad staan om die prop uit te trek (bloot omdat die meganisme gebreek het en ons nie noodwendig tyd het om daardie probleem te probeer oplos nie). Dan dwaal my oog na die verlore sponsnommer (hoeka nommer 7) wat in die rakkie ingedruk is, waarmee die kinders altyd speel as hulle bad.
Maar dis asof die stickeez en die sponsnommer ‘n sameswering het en my koggel. Hulle koggel my deur klem te lê op die leë bad, die bad wat elke dan en wan ‘n paar goggas en stof in het van min of geen gebruik. Dan is dit asof hulle die mes dwars draai in my hart. Die pyn skiet deur my hele lyf soos wat ek tot die besef kom – die kinders is nou groot.
Weg is die dae van langs die bad sit, speel, syfers, alfabet en kleure leer met die einste sponsletters en -nommers. Weg is die oomblikke wat soms vir my te lank en uitmergelend gevoel het. (Die Here ken my hart en ek is oortuig dat elke ma sulke dae beleef het). Ek het so gevoel, veral wanneer daar min geslaap was a.g.v. borsvoeding deur die nag, of lang ure se werk (of beide tegelyk). Dit was nie die kinders se skuld dat ek so gevoel het nie, tog het dit vir my gevoel of die oomblikke wat ek moet koester, net sommige dae (veral as ek baie moeg was en baie sleg geslaap het) net een te veel was vir my om te hanteer.
Ek gesels vroeër die week met ‘n vriendin en sy vertel my dat iemand sê vir haar hulle het net nog 7 Kersfeeste (is dit die regte woord?) oor saam met haar oudste in die huis, dan is dit verby. Ek kyk haar in ongeloof aan, so asof sy vir my jok. Ek begin dink en somme maak. Ek het minder as dit oor saam met my oudste!! Wanneer ek maande, weke en naweke het soos wat ons gehad het van Januarie af tot nou in Maart, waar ek my dae omwerk, naweke omwerk net om deur alles te kom en betyds ingedien te kry, raak ek hier diep binne in my opstandig teen my werk.
Ek raak verby kwaad want ek voel my werk steel by my en my kinders. Om alles te kroon, is sommige kere se dae, weke, naweke omwerk nie eens beloon met vergoeding nie, want die mense (baie, nie net een nie) skitter in hul afwesigheid om betaling te maak op die staat wat geduldig, maand na maand per e-pos uitgestuur word. Ongelukkig het Pastel nie die mannetjie wat op sy knieë staan en huil, met die woorde Please pay, overdue wat jy kan opsit nie. Nie soos die ou dae se state wat die kantoor tannie gedruk het, gestempel het met Mr. Please Pay Overdue, netjies opgevou en gepos het nie. Nee, nou is dit net te gerieflik en maklik om die e-posse ongelees te laat.
Maar daar verloor ek alweer wat ek eintlik wil sê. Jy sien, hierdie opstandigheid skep weer bitterheid en die bitterheid maak mens siek en moeg. Mors kosbare energie. So terug by die leë bad. Ek dink daaraan die heeldag terwyl ek Johannesburg toe ry na ‘n kliënt toe, en terug ook. Ek wonder by myself juis hoekom die Here my attent gemaak het op die bad?
Ek begin dink, wanneer laas HET die kinders in ons bad gebad? Iewers tussen laas jaar en hierdie jaar het hulle net begin stort in hul eie badkamer. Aan die begin was dit vir my lekker om my badkamer weer terug te hê vir myself (en my man natuurlik). Sonder speelgoed wat die wêreld vol lê. Maar skielik is die besef daar dat dit vir ewig verby is, die speelgoed wat rondlê. Dit wat die grootste irritasie by my veroorsaak het is nou weg en dit impliseer dat die kinders groot word en ‘n nuwe fase in beweeg.
Ek dink ook terug aan ‘n gesprek met ‘n ander vriendin (ook vroeër die week, en ja, ek gesels met baie mense gereeld). Sy vertel my haar oudste is op Universiteit. Ek kyk haar in ongeloof aan (weer asof sy óók vir my jok). Sy is dan 42, hoe kan sy ‘n kind op Universiteit hê? Dan besef ek sy is tog reg, hy is reeds 18. Sy vertel my net dat ek die lê langs die kinders in die aande moet geniet, duld en verdra. As jy weer sien is dit verby.
Met trane in my oë besef ek dat ek ten minste nou net ‘n leë bad het. Sy het nou 3 goed wat leeg is – ‘n bad, ‘n bed en ‘n kamer. Ek voel hoe die Heilige Gees aan my hart werk, die mes wat dwars gedraai is sagkuns uithaal. Dit maak nie minder seer nie, die realiteit van die leë bad. Maar Hy herinner my dat ek nog 2 uit die 3 goed het in my huis. “Koester dit” voel ek die fluistering in my gees. “Hê meer geduld en vertrou my net met die werk en alles wat jou so pla” praat Hy verder.
“Los alles by die voete van Jesus” woorde wat ek oor en oor vir myself sê, en ander mense ook vir my sê en ek selfs uiter aan ander wat mismoedig is. “Dis MOEILIK Here!” skree ek amper terug. “Almal verwag iets van my elke oomblik van elke dag. Ek is net EEN mens. Teen die tyd dat die kinders by die huis kom in die middae is ek op soos ou brood. Waar krap mens dan geduld uit? Ek het nie eens krummels oor nie? Plus my kinders verdien meer as net krummels.” redeneer ek hier met die Here verder. So asof Hy NIKS weet wat in my lewe aangaan nie.
Ek raak weer stil en sien weer die bad. Die bad wat leeg is. Dan sien ek die kamers wat vol is en die beddens wat ons elke aand deel met ons kinders. Ek weet dis ok om dit so te doen. Selfs al frons ander mense vir jou, weet ek dis ok vir ons. Dis die bietjie wat ons kan terug gee vir ons kinders vir al die nagte, naweke, vakansies, dae, weke, maande se werk en uitmis op tyd saam met hulle, nie tyd kry vir help met leerwerk en take nie, die lysie is LAAANK. Vir al die stank-vir-dank werk wat ons al vir mense gedoen het. Vir al die onbetaalde rekeninge, sonder Mr. Please Pay Overdue op.
Ek voel ‘n rustigheid oor my kom en weet, die Here ken my hart. Ek doen die beste wat ek kan met dit wat ek het. My beste sal seker nooit goed genoeg wees in my eie oë nie want ek het hierdie verwagting, ‘n verwagting van hoe die lewe moet wees. Nie hoe die lewe in werklikheid is nie. Ek hoop regtig dat my beste goed genoeg is vir my kinders.
Ek los dan ook my onbetaalde rekeninge sonder Mr. Please Pay Overdue op by die voete van Jesus, saam met my werk en die druk wat saam met dit gaan, saam met wat vir my voel soos 10 miljoen ander goed. I need only to be still, for the Lord will fight the fight for me eggo dit deur my kop. Die Here veg al voel dit nie so nie. Hy veg want ons kan dit nie in eie mag doen nie. Exodus 14:14 (KJV) The LORD shall fight for you, and ye shall hold your peace. Ek sit die laaste stukkie ding by Jesus se voete neer, die leë bad. Dan draai ek om en gaan soek my geduld krummels, skraap bymekaar sodat my kinders darem meer as net krummels kan ervaar vanmiddag en elke middag en aand van nou af.
Just like that, February 2022 came and went. We survived another big deadline. At times it really felt as if the ball and chain that I was wearing at the Accountant’s Inn, was heavier than what it was supposed to be. Some days were harder than others. I paced myself to work, at what felt like a snails pace, during February, just to get through everything. I did not work long hours on one day, but rather more days in the week.
Then, suddenly, on 28 February 2022, it was as if I could feel how the key was being turned in the lock so that I will be released earlier than planned. By 12 noon, I clicked on the submit button on my last IRP 6return. I sit back and think – HOW DID THIS HAPPEN? This has NEVER happened before? In previous years, we sit and work so hard, the only sound you can hear are our fingers typing away at our key boards and mouse clicks flying like they are going out of fashion (I wonder how many clicks we do on a mouse in a day??), echoing in our ears, as we struggle to get everything submitted in time.
Other years, I usually submitted the last returns around 9 or 10 at night, sometimes even just before midnight. I still recall my daughter (now 8) at a younger age, bringing a pillow and blanket to sleep on the floor in the office while I was working to get everything submitted on time. Suddenly the load is just lighter.
Everyone gets into bed at a reasonable time. It almost feels wrong, as if we forgot someone or something. We review the control list again – no, we did not forget anyone, all have been submitted. I realise again, as if it is a new revelation, that we made the deadline because we have a set of hands that WORKS and KNOWS what she is doing. Someone we can trust to do the work and to do accurate calculations. Bringing her side, pulling her weight, irrespective of her circumstances.
Come 1 March 2022, I woke up and I almost want to say with a song in my heart. The song is not quite there for my work (although I thoroughly realise that if I do not work, this blog will not exist, amongst other things, other than the obvious provision for our basic needs), but the song is there in my heart, for what God has planned for me and what He is revealing bit by bit.
You see, God is revealing more and more to me while I start to advertise the Beroepsvrou platform more and doing new designs, everything between the day job. On that particular day (March 1st) I saw a client. I was not stationed at my desk and that is just what happened that day. I was recovering from working almost 9 days in a row (even if it was not 7 or 10 hours every day), just finding my feet in the next task that had been staring at me, waiting (im)patiently for me to finish it off.
I wondered the whole day WHAT the scripture for March was, I truly could not remember it. Eventually I got to tear off the dirty page for February. It was as if it reflected HOW hard I worked by being extra dirty. Water marks, ink that smudged, you name it, that was what my February calendar looked like. Eventually I sat down to read the verse. I think it was only on the second of March.
I read it and for a fleeting moment it did not make sense. I wondered by myself WHY I chose THAT verse? It does not make sense, the sentence starts blunt and in the middle of something. I decide to view it on the bible app on my phone. I read it and still it does not make sense. I decide to start reading from a few verses before this one.
Finally I understand! I grasped it!! I could not fit EVERYTHING on the calendar, plus this particular verse was on a key ring that I purchased some time ago. It was said in such a beautiful way on the keyring and hence the reason for choosing this scripture. If you are perhaps wondering why I cannot recall the scripture that was chosen – the last time I worked on these designs were in October / November 2021.
Six years’ time has passed (that is how it feels to me in the mere 6 months that actually passed). My brain cannot remember every single little bit of detail. Ok so back to the verse. I start reading from verse 45. My eye catches the heading just beneath verse 45 – The Magnificat. At first I looked at this thinking WHAT DOES THIS MEAN? (Remember I read this in Afrikaans first and there it is clear what this is).
Anyway, I compare the scripture to other versions in my application on my phone and the New Living Translation has extra words, Mary’s Song of Praise, next to it. (I also Googled the word Magnificat and there it refers to the hymn of the Virgin Mary.) Wow, that is very interesting. I feel as if I have a song in my heart and here is the scripture that refers to a song that was sung by Jesus’ Mother. WOW that is coincidence – or is it? I know with God NOTHING is ever a coincidence.
Luke 1 : 45 – 49 And blessed [spiritually fortunate and favored by God] is she who believed and confidently trusted that there would be a fulfillment of the things that were spoken to her [by the angel sent] from the Lord.” And Mary said, “My soul magnifies and exalts the Lord, And my spirit has rejoiced in God my Savior. For He has looked [with loving care] on the humble state of His maidservant; For behold, from now on all generations will count me blessed and happy and favored by God! For He who is mighty has done great things for me; And holy is His name [to be worshiped in His purity, majesty, and glory]. Amplified translation.
There is so much more to this scripture than what I can even begin to think or realise… I almost feel like I have to break up this scripture and analyze it a bit further. There is so much power captured in this. So many promises for me and for each one who believes and stands on that which God has called them for and that which He has disclosed to them of their calling.
So het Februarie 2022 gekom en gegaan. Nog ‘n sperdatum was oorleef. By tye het dit regtig gevoel of die ball & chain wat ek by die Accountant’s Inn gedra het swaarder was as wat hy veronderstel was om te wees. Sommige dae was moeiliker as ander. Ek het myself teen ‘n, wat vir my soos ‘n slakke pas voel, laat werk in Februarie, net om deur als te kom. Nie lang ure op een dag noodwendig nie, maar eerder meer dae in die week.
Skielik op 28 Februarie 2022,was dit asof ek kon voel hoe die sleutel in die slot gedraai word en hy vroeër as beplan losgemaak gaan word. Teen 12 uur die middag click ek submit op my laaste IRP 6 opgawe. Ek sit terug en dink by myself – HOE HET DIT GEBEUR? Dit het NOG NOOIT gebeur nie? Elke ander jaar tevore sit en werk ons dat die spoeg spat en tik dat dit al klank is wat jy in jou ore hoor eggo, saam met die muis se click geluide (ek wonder hoeveel keer click ‘n mens se muis daagliks?), soos wat ons spartel om alles betyds in te dien.
Ander jare dien ek gewoonlik hier teen 9 of 10 uur die aand die laaste opgawes in, soms nog later en net voor middernag. Ek onthou nog hoe my dogtertjie (nou 8) haar kussing en kombers gebring het en op die vloer by my geslaap het terwyl ek sit en werk. Maar skielik is daardie las net ligter. Ons almal kom teen ‘n redelike tyd in die bed.
Dit voel amper verkeerd, so asof ons iets of iemand vergeet het. Ons gaan weer deur die lysie – nee, niemand vergeet nie, almal ingedien. Ek besef opnuut dat ons die sperdatum gehaal het omdat ons ‘n stel hande het wat WERK en wat WEET wat sy doen. Iemand wat ons kan vertrou om werk en berekeninge akkuraat te doen. Haar kant te bring ongeag haar omstandighede.
So staan ek 1 Maart 2022 op, ek wil amper sê met ‘n lied in my hart. Die lied is nog nie daar vir my werk nie (alhoewel ek besef dat as ek nie werk nie, hierdie blog nie sal kan bestaan nie en natuurlik weet ek dat my werk in ons behoeftes voorsien), maar die lied is wel daar vir dit wat die Here vir my beplan en wat Hy vir my so stuk-stuk begin wys.
Dit alles terwyl ek Beroepsvrou se platform meer bemark en nuwe ontwerpe doen, en tussen werk deur. Ek sien ‘n kliënt die betrokke dag (1ste Maart) en sit nie eintlik by my tafel om te werk nie, dis maar net wat daardie dag gebeur het. Ek recover so bietjie van die amper 9 dae se werk aaneen (al is dit nie 7 of 10 ure elke dag nie, dis steeds werk elke dag) en vind net my voete in die volgende taak wat vir my lê en loer….en (on)geduldig wag tot ek dit afhandel.
Ek wonder die heeldag WAT die maand se skrif vers is, en kan dit wragties nie onthou nie. Uiteindelik skeur ek Februarie se vuil bladsy af. So asof die bladsy weerspieël HOE hard ek gewerk het deur ekstra vuil te wees. Waterkolle, ink wat smeer, jy noem dit, dit is hoe Februarie se kalender aan my kant gelyk het. So gaan sit ek UITEINDELIK weer en lees die vers, ek dink hoeka dit was eers 2 Maart.
Ek lees en vir ‘n oomblik maak dit nie sin nie. Ek wonder by myself HOEKOM op dees aarde het ek nou DAARDIE skrif gekies? Dit maak nie sin nie, die sin begin so stomp en in die middel van iets. Ek trek dadelik my foon nader en lees op die Bybel toepassing (hoe is daai vir ‘n fêncy Afrikaanse woord vir application?). Ek lees, maar steeds maak dit nie sin nie. Ek besluit om so paar verse vroeër te begin lees.
Uiteindelik het ek dit! Ek snap dit!! Ek kon nie ALLES inpas op die kalender nie, PLUS die skrif vers is op ‘n sleutelhouer wat ek een keer gekoop het. Dit was vir my so mooi hoe dit op die sleutelhouer was en daarom dat ek hom gekies het. As jy dalk wonder hoe ek nou nie die skrif wat EK gekies het kan onthou nie – ek het Oktober / November 2021 laas aan die ontwerpe gewerk.
Ses jaar se tyd, voel dit vir my, het sedertdien in die kort rukkie van ongeveer 6 maande verloop. My brein kan net nie elke liewe detail onthou nie. Goed, so terug by die skrif vers. Ek begin lees van vers 45 af. My oog vang die opskrif net onder vers 45 – Die loflied van Maria. Sjoe, dis nou vir jou interessant. Ek voel of ek ‘n lied in my hart het, en hier is die skrif ook ‘n lied wat deur Jesus se Moeder gesing was. WOW dis nou vir my toevallig, of is dit? Maar ek weet dadelik met God is NIKS ooit toevallig nie.
Lukas 1: 45-49 Gelukkig is sy wat glo dat in vervulling sal gaan wat die Here vir haar gesê het!” En Maria het gesê: “Ek besing die grootheid van die Here, omdat Hy na my in my geringheid omgesien het. Kyk, van nou af sal elke nuwe geslag my gelukkig noem, omdat Hy wat magtig is, groot dinge aan my gedoen het. Heilig is sy Naam! Afrikaans 1983 vertaling.
Hier is soveel meer aan hierdie skrif as wat ek kan dink of besef….ek voel amper ek moet dit versie vir versie opbreek en analiseer. Daar is soveel krag hierin. Soveel beloftes vir my en vir elkeen wat glo en staan op dit wat die Here openbaar aan my en hulle oor dit waarvoor ons geroep is.
Alóhahere from the Accountants Inn. Wait, Alóha sounds too exotic, almost as if I am watching over the ocean (exotic like white sand and turquoise water) while I am doing all these calculations, the speed dating of tax as I like to refer to provisional tax. Maybe I should rather say Modimôle, Modimôle like the advertisement of Lekkeslaap? It sounds almost more realistic of where I find myself….and not that I think that Modimôle is a jail or less exotic place….I am sure you understand what I am trying to say.
All jokes aside. This will be my closing chapter on this scripture. February is short, the pressure is high and the work load is astronomical, and I am more than likely not going to be able to find time to publish another something about this scripture after this entry.
So….I want to close off by saying that when I look back on February, I can conclude that I had one very interesting month, especially while thinking about the verse. You see, my sweet words were also under attack. Not only that which were snarled at me, but those which I uttered. Emotions were running high, stress levels were through the roof, life goes on and I just have to cope with everything.
It certainly was not easy, nor was it all glamorous and pretty. But I certainly learnt a lot and grew in the process. I know I must think before I speak, especially if I am frustrated with something and then I have a conversation with someone close to me about something else. I must not let my frustrations spill and tumble over into those conversations.
It is certainly easier said that done and I contemplate and doubt whether my words contain serotonin, similar to honey. But God showed me what I did wrong so that I could repent and ask for forgiveness, and learn from my mistakes. Is this not part of the process of becoming holy like Jesus?
I want to close off by saying that we are going to have to answer to God one day about the words that we utter. BUT He has LOTS of grace for us, He forgives us and then it is as if it never happened. What we must remember is to stop sinning and truly turn our backs on that. We must stop with our bad habits and poorly chosen words.
It takes 21 days to break a habit, if I started 1 February with that, then, theoretically I should have overcome it by Monday 21 February or Tuesday 22 February….but, we do not consciously make such decisions regarding bad habits on a daily basis, this is also not something that happens to me every 5 minutes or every hour. To me it is not similar to having bad eating habits that I want to turn around. No, for me it is very sporadic and random at times but I suppose that can also be seen as habitual, because I always act the same way in similar situations.
I must learn from my mistakes and pass the test. Because surely I am going to keep on writing the test until I pass it. Even if it takes more than 21 days….so long and farewell until next month when I write about the March scripture! Alóha from the Accountants Inn. (Is Alóha not hello and goodbye in Hawaii?)
Alóha hier vanuit die Accountants Inn. Wag, Alóha klink te eksoties, so asof ek vir die see sit en kyk (wit sand en turquoise water se eksoties) terwyl ek werk aan al die berekeninge, die speed dating van belasting soos ek na voorlopigebelasting verwys. Miskien moet ek eerder sê Modimôle, Modimôle soos die Lekkeslaap advertensie? Dit klink amper meer realisties van waar ek myself bevind….en nie dat ek nou dink Modimôle is ‘n tronk of minder eksoties nie….ek is seker julle verstaan wat ek bedoel.
Alle grappies op ‘n stokkie. Hierdie sal my slot hoofstuk wees. Februarie is kort, die druk hoog en die werk astronomies baie en ek gaan heel waarskynlik na die inskrywing nie weer tyd kry om ietsie te publiseer oor die maand se skrif vers nie.
So….ek wil afsluit deur te sê dat ek een ongelooflike interessante maand gehad het as ek terug kyk en aan die skrif vers dink. Jy sien, my soet woorde was self aangeval ook. Nie net dit wat aan my toegesnou was nie, maar dit wat ek geuiter het. Gemoedere loop hoog, spanning is baie, die lewe gaan aan en ek moet net cope met alles.
Dit was vir seker nie maklik nie en ook nie maanskyn en rose heel maand nie. Maar ek het vir seker geleer en gegroei in die proses. Ek weet ek moet dink voor ek praat, veral as ek gefrustreerd is met iets en ‘n gespek oor iets anders met iemand na aan my het. Ek moet nie dat my frustrasies oorspoel in daardie gesprekke toe nie.
Dis vir seker makliker gesê as gedaan en ek weet nie of my woorde aldag seritonien bevat het soos wat heuning bevat nie. Maar die Here het my gewys wat ek verkeerd doen sodat ek kon repent en omvergifnis vra en leer uit my foute uit. Dis mos deel van die heiligmakingsproses is dit nie?
Ek wil afsluit deur te sê dat ons woorde wat ons uiter, ons voor rekenskap gaan moet gee eendag voor die Here. MAAR Hy het BAIE genade vir ons en as ons Hom omvergifnis vra vir dit wat ons verkeerd gedoen het, vergewe Hy ons en is dit asof dit nooit gebeur het nie. Wat ons wel moet onthou, is om op te hou sonde pleeg en werklik ons rug op dit te draai en te bekeer. Ons moet ophou met slegte gewoontes soos slegte woorde.
Dit vat 21 dae om ‘n gewoonte te breek, as ek 1 Februarie begin het met dit, moet ek teoreties teen Maandag 21 Februarie of Dinsdag 22 Februarie dit afgeleer het…maar, ons maak nie aldag sulke doelbewuste besluite in slegte gewoontes nie, want dit is nie iets wat vir my elke 5 minute gebeur of elke uur nie. Nie soos wanneer ek probeer slegte eetgewoontes reg kry nie. Nee, vir my is dit sporadies en op random tye maar kan seker maar gesien word as gewoonte, omdat ek altyd dieselfde optree in dieselfde situasies.
Ek moet nou net leer uit my foute en my toets slaag. Want ek gaan hom vir seker aanhou skryf tot ek hom regkry! Al vat dit meer as 21 dae….ek groet nou tot volgende maand en wanneer ek oor volgende maand se skrif skryf! Alóha hier vanuit Accountants Inn. (Alóha is mos hallo en totsiens in Hawaï is dit nie?)
Die Engelse opskrif klink vir my meer catchy. Maar toemaar, ek is seker julle verstaan wat ek hier bedoel. Elkgeval, terug by my ervaring van hierdie ding wat ons etiese opleiding noem….ek het eers my oë gerol (ek het dit al voorheen genoem) om opleiding te doen om eties te wees. Vir my is dit ‘n natuurlike ding en my verwagting van ander mense is ook om so te wees.
Duidelik funksioneer ander nie soos ek nie (wat ‘n skok vir die sisteem, dog die waarheid en realiteit). Maar, soos ek deur alles werk, besef ek net daar is iets diepers betrokke hierby. Natuurlik kan niemand geleer word om eties te wees nie! Maar, as jy jou denk patrone verander, sal jy tot die besef kom oor hoe dit jou lewe, aksies, keuses en uitkomste werklik beïnvloed.
Iewers tussen September 2021 en Februarie 2022 het ek behoorlik uitgefreak oor die etiese opleiding. Elke keer wanneer ek ‘n kennisgewing kry dat daar nuwe inhoud beskikbaar is (die begin van die maand gewoonlik) dan begin ek amper hiper-ventileer. Want regtig, WAAR moet ek die tyd kry om alles te DOEN wat daar van my verwag word? Ek het slegs maand 1 se opleiding gedoen teen einde Desember en nou moet ek 11 maande se goed opvang in iets soos 8 maande of minder (ek weet eintlik nie hoeveel nie, ek het dit nie gaan uitwerk nie en my brein is regtig net te moeg om uit te werk hoeveel tyd het ek nog oor van my 12 maande etiese opleiding).
Dan, tussen al die chaos deur wat ek ervaar, kalmeer die Here my gedagtes. Dis ok om agter te raak. Dit gebeur. Weer freak ek uit want ek is nou eers besig met maand 2 se joernaal inskrywings wat daagliks moet plaasvind en HOE GAAN EK DIT DOEN??? Ek het amper in my gedagtes geskree vir God (met respek as daar so iets bestaan). Ek het ‘n tantrum gegooi. Ek sal nou nie die Afrikaanse slagspreuk gebruik nie, maar iewers in dit is ‘n vloer en iets wat rym met vloer. Ek is seker jy weet wat ek hier bedoel.
Dit het my die HELE Januarie gevat om ‘n klomp goed uit te werk, insluitende die opleiding in ‘n baie besige skedule. Dan iewers tussen my geskree en freak out wat ek gehad het, kom die lig aan. Wat die proses jou EINTLIK probeer leer is nie om jou inskrywings te begin met Liewe Dagboek nie. Nee. Wat hulle ons probeer leer om te doen is om ons gedagtes te declutter van goed en gedagtes wat jou so besig hou en jou vreugde en fokus steel.
Sodra jy dit begin neerskryf en uit jou gedagtes uit kry, kan jy meer fokus op die dag wat voorlê. Makliker gesê as gedaan, MAAR dis die uiteinde dink ek. Ons het soveel clutter op soveel vlakke, dis SCARY!! Dit begin intimiderend raak en as jy weer sien is jy oorweldig, angstig en kan jy eintlik nie werk soos jy veronderstel is om te werk nie, alles op dieselfde tyd.
Ek het ‘n doelbewuste besluit geneem om die eerste week in Februarie, net te BEGIN met hierdie opleiding en dit net te doen. En ek het. En dit laat my meer bemagtig voel (is dit die regte woord vir accomplished?). Ek voel beter want ek is besig om baba tree se vordering te maak….en raai wat??? Jy HOEF nie eers maand 2 se joernaal inskrywings klaar te maak voor jy kan aangaan met maand 3 nie.
Nee, jy kan daagliks joernaal inskrywings maak, maand 2 se video’s kyk (en al die inhoud lees net so terloops), die assessering doen en aan beweeg na maand 3 toe. Dit is wat ek gaan doen. Ek kan mos meer as een daaglikse inskrywing doen as ek wil. Daar is geen reëls nie, so dis haalbaar om op te vang en in te haal.
Wat ek ook gaan doen, is om te probeer kombineer met wat ookal in maand 3 gebeur met maand 2 se joernaal inskrywings en so uitbrei. Ek het GEEN idee wat maand 3 vir my inhou nie, maar ek is reg vir dit. Dankie tog ek het ‘n hoër mag (die Here as jy gewonder het) wat oor my waak. Wat ek ook begin doen het is om so 2 tot 3 joernaal inskrywings se vrae te antwoord in een dag. Deur dit te doen, maak ek ook vordering en vang ek ook op!! My plan, is soos elke ander plan in die lewe – onder ontwikkelling en onderhewig aan verandering.
God inspireer my, kalmeer my, gee my planne om my vrese en probleme wat ek daagliks ervaar, te oorwin, sodat ek iets so eenvoudig soos hierdie etiese opleiding kan doen. Dit is regtig nie so moeilik nie en sal my vir seker baat op die lang duur. Jy sien, wat jy, die leser van die artikel nie sien nie, is die angstige gedagtes wat ek daagliks het, oor alles – goed, lewe, kinders, werk.
Dit affekteer my vermoë om te werk en produktief te wees. So vir die buite wêreld lyk ek soos iets, ek weet eintlik nie waarmee om myself te vergelyk nie, maar ek kom voor as iets anders as wat ek werklik is. Ek sit maar ‘n brawe gesig op elke dag, smile and waive, fake it ’till you make it tipe houding. Dit gee ‘n wan-persepsie van wie ek werklik is.
Maar, iewers tussen my skrywery op die platform deur, terwyl ek my bybelstudie doen (terwyl ek blog) en my gedagtes joernaliseer, is ek besig om iets te word, iemand beter as wat ek voorheen was. Hierdie proses help my om te declutter in my gedagtes en nie so angstig te wees soos ek altyd was nie.
Ek kry dit steeds nie reg op ‘n daaglikse basis nie, maar sommige dae is beter as ander. Hierdie is alles ‘n leer-proses vir my, iets wat my as mens ontwikkel. En natuurlik het die Here vir my gewys dat ek een van my Beroepsvrou dagboeke kan gebruik vir hierdie doel! Vir hierdie etiese opleiding en daaglikse bybel verse!
Een ding wat ek wel agter gekom het, is, na ek hierdie artikel begin skryf het begin Februarie, het daar ‘n klomp tyd verloop. Twee weke (of is dit nou drie?) het verby gegaan en ek probeer my uiterste beste om hierdie etiese opleiding se joernaal inskrywings daagliks te doen, op ‘n weeksdag (naweke is so bietjie anders en moeiliker omdat ons ‘n ander roetine het). Elkgeval, terug by wat ek probeer sê. Wanneer jy die joernaal vrae antwoord (dit kry eintlik net jou gedagtes aan die gang) oor hoe jy byvoorbeeld, kan verbeter om take af te handel, is dit asof die duiwel en al sy nasaad (in Engels verwys ek na spawn of the devil) jou aanval op dit wat jy neergeskryf het.
Vir my is dit baie interessant, dog niks nuuts nie. Jy sien, wanneer dit met my gebeur, sit ek met ‘n glimlag op my gesig en neem ek kennis hiervan, want, wanneer ek voel of ek aangeval word, weet ek net dat ek op die regte spoor is! Die duiwel weet ook wat my potensiaal is en hy sal alles probeer om my te keer om te doen wat gedoen moet word.
Moet nie mismoedig voel as jy ‘n twee of drie weke tydperk agter die rug het soos wat ek gehad het nie (na ek met die etiese joernaal inskrywings begin het). Dit beteken net dat jy op die regte spoor is en moet aanhou en deur druk! En net asof die Here wil bevestig vir my wat ek hier sê, kry ek ‘n bybelvers net na ek die artikel begin afsluit. 2 Thessalonicense 3:3. Wat ‘n powerful en profound skrif vers om te kry wanneer jy voel of jy aangeval word!
So, as jy steeds wonder of dit die moeite wêrd sal wees om die kursus te doen of waar jy die tyd sal vind – hou op om dit te oordink. Hou op om te prokrastineer soos wat ek vir maande gedoen het. Begin net en voor jy weet, sal jy soveel meer kennis hê en insig kry as voor jy hierdie hele proses begin het.
Een ding wat ek opgemerk het van hierdie opleiding is dat jy ALLES MOET LEES!! Voor jy die aanlyn assessering probeer, maak seker jy LEES die inhoud….dit gaan jou net versterk in jou kennis en self-worth (en natuurlik gaan jy die assessering slaag as jy alles gelees het want die vrae kom nie net uit die videos uit nie).
Ek kan afsluit en ‘n gevolgtrekking maak dat Ek tot alles in staat is deur Christus wat my krag gee! Fillipense 4:13. Ek kan selfs hierdie opleiding ding doen, werk EN ‘n ma wees!! En dit nogals in Februarie, ons besigste maand! Want regtig, WANNEER is ‘n goeie tyd om te begin? Dis nou of nooit!
Note the pun in the heading. Anyway, back to my experience of this thing called training and ethics….so at first I rolled my eyes (I have said this before) at having to do training about being ethical. To me it comes naturally and that is my expectation that I have of others.
Clearly everyone does not function like I do (what a shocker to my system but a reality and truth). But as I work through everything, I realise that there is something deeper here. Of course no one can be taught to be ethical! But you can start to think about your thoughts and how it influences your life and actions.
I was freaking out somewhere between September 2021 and February 2022 about this ethics training. Everytime I get a notification about new content (at the beginning of the month) I almost start to hyperventilate. Because seriously, WHERE am I supposed to find the time to DO that which is expected of me. I only did month 1 by end December and now I have to catch up 11 months in something like 8 months or less (I don’t know, I did not calculate this and quite frankly my brain is too exhausted to calculate how many months are left of my 12 months ethics).
Then, amongst all the chaos I was experiencing, God calmed my thoughts. It is ok to fall behind. It happens. Again I was freaking out because now I am only in month 2’s journalling that has to take place daily and HOW AM I GOING TO DO THIS??? I was almost screaming in my mind to God (with respect). Throwing a tantrum.
It took me the whole of January to figure a lot of things out, including this training that I have to fit into a very busy schedule. Then somewhere between screaming and freaking out, the light came on. What this process is trying to teach you is to not start your journal entries with Dear diary. Nope. What they are trying to get us to do is to declutter your mind of stuff and thoughts that occupy you and steal your joy and focus.
Once you start writing them down and getting them out of your mind, you can become more focussed on the day ahead. Easier said than done BUT this is the bottom line I think. We have so much clutter on so many levels in our lives, it is SCARY! It becomes intimidating and when you see again you are overwhelmed, underpeforming and anxious all at the same time.
I made a conscious decision during the first week of Feb, to just START with this training and just do it. And I did. And that makes me feel more accomplished because I am making baby steps in progress….and guess what??? You don’t HAVE to do every day’s journalling for month 2 before you can proceed to month 3.
No, you can journal daily, watch month 2’s videos (and read the material by the way), do the assessment and move on to month 3. That is what I am going to do. I can answer more than one daily journalling thought if I want to, there are no rules, so it is manageable to actually catch up.
What I am also going to do, is combine what ever is added on in month 3 with month 2’s journalling and just expand. I have no idea what month 3 has installed for me but I am ready for it. Thank goodness I have a higher power (called God if you were wondering) watching over me.What I also started doing, is to answer 2 to 3 journalling questions on one day. That way I will also make progress and catch up!! My plan for this is like every plan in life – under development and subject to change.
God inspires me, calms me, gives me my plans to overcome my fears and problems I face daily so that I can so something as simple as this ethics training. It is really not that hard and it will really benefit me in the long run. You see, what you, the reader of this article, don’t see is, in the background there are all these anxiety thoughts I have daily about stuff, life, kids, work.
This affects my ability to work and be productive. So to the outside world I look like something, I don’t know what to compare myself with, but I appear to be something I am not, to others. I put on a brave face daily, smile and waive, fake it till you make it type of attitude, which is what others perceive to be this thing which I am not.
However, between writing this blog, doing my bible study while blogging and journaling my thoughts like I am being thaught in this course, I am actually becoming something and someone better than what I was before. This all helps me to declutter my mind and not be as panicked as I used to be.
I still don’t get it right on a daily basis, but some days are better than others. This all is a learning and developing process to me. And of course God showed me what I could use one of my Beroepsvrou diaries for! For this ethics journalling and daily bible verses!
One thing I have noted, is, after I started writing this article at the beginning of February, an amount of time has lapsed. Two weeks (or is it three?) have passed and I am trying my utmost best to do this ethics journaling daily on a weekday (weekends are different because then our routine is slightly different). Anyway, back to what I am trying to say. When you answer the journaling questions (that just gets your mind going) about how you can improve, for example on finishing tasks, it is like the devil and all the spawn of the devil, attacks you on what you wrote down.
To me this is very interesting, yet nothing new. You see, when ever this happens to me, I grin and I take note of this, because when I feel under attack, I know I am on the right track! The devil also knows my potential and he will try everything to stop me from doing what needs to be done.
Don’t be discouraged if you have had a two to three week period like I have after starting this ethics journaling. It only means you are doing something right and you must persevere and push through! And as if God just wants to confirm what I am saying here, I get a bible verse shortly after finishing up this article – 2 Thessalonians 3:3. What a powerful and profound scripture to get when feeling like you are under attack!
So, if you are still wondering if it will be worth it to do this course, or where you will find the time – stop overthinking it. Stop procrastinating like I did for months. Just start doing and before you know it, you will be so much more knowledgeable than what you were before you started this whole thing.
One thing I have noted from this training is you HAVE TO READ everything!! Before you attempt the questions and assessment, make sure you READ the content…after all, it will only strengthen your knowledge and self-worth.
I can conclude that I can do all things with Christ! Phillipians 4:13. I can even do this training thing, work AND be a mom! And nogal in February, our busiest month! Because really, WHEN is it a good time to start? It is now or never!
I have been thinking about this month’s scripture as the month is progressing and life is getting more and more hectic work wise. It makes me wonder as to why Solomon referred to honey in this scripture and why it is referred to as being able to heal.
Naturally I grab my phone to google the medicinal value of honey. The facts that Mrs. Google showed me was pretty interesting…
It enhances immunity. So it physically helps to keep your body healthy. Very interesting. I read a little further – it enhances serotonin. Now those of you who do not know – serotonin is the feel good hormone that makes you feel happy (amongst other things) and it also regulates a whole lot of other things.
It is further my understanding that it contains anti-oxidants, reduces stress and anxiety, is anti-bacterial and a whole list of other things. It was really interesting to read all these facts about honey. Surely Solomon did not google the medicinal facts about honey when he wrote this piece of scripture.
No, he was the wisest person ever who lived on earth and it was the Godly wisdom that God blessed him with that is portrayed in this scripture. Wow, what an awesome revelation about this scripture!
Sweet words have the same healing effects as honey….if this is then true, then surely the opposite must be true too? Destructive words that criticizes, are like an illness that eats away at you and will eventually kill and destroy you if you keep on listening to (and uttering) such words. Makes you think does it not….?
Soos wat die besige maand vorder dink ek steeds aan die skrif. Dit laat my verder dink aan hoekom Salomo na heuning verwys het en hoekom dit as genesend is in die teksvers.
Natuurlik gaan gryp ek my foon en google die medisinale waarde van heuning. Dis nou nogal interessant hierdie feite wat Mevrou Google toe nou vir my uitspoeg…
Dit bevorder immuniteit. So dit hou jou lyf fisies gesond. Dis interessant. Ek lees verder – dit bevorder serotinien. Nou seritonien is die feel good hormone wat jou gelukkig laat voel (onder andere) en die spesifieke hormoon reguleer ook ‘n hele rits ander goed.
Dit bevat anti-oksidante, verminder stress en angs, is anti-bacterial (by gebrek aan ‘n beter woord in Afrikaans – die Afrikaanse woord klink tog so formeel) en nog ‘n hele rits ander goed soos ek dit nou verstaan.
Dit was vir my interessant om al hierdie feite te lees. Salomo het vir seker nie google gebruik toe hy hierdie skrif geskryf het nie.Nee, hy was die slimste mens ooit op aarde en dit was die Goddelike wysheid waarmee die Here hom geseën het. Wow. Wat ‘n awesome revelation oor hierdie teks en heuning!
Soet woorde is so genesend soos heuning…so dan moet die teenoorgestelde dan waar wees? Afbrekende woorde is soos siekte wat jou verdor en dood maak as jy aanhou luister na afbrekende woorde (en aanhou om dit te uiter). Laat mens dink nê….?
“You are what you eat.” How many times have I heard that line before? It is almost like the advertisement from the late 80’s – Farmer Brown’s Chickens. “They look so good because they eat so good.” I can still recall the oom‘s voice (oom just sounds better here than uncle). If I recall correctly it was a bit of a husky voice (is that the right term? In Afrikaans we call it rasperstem.)
Husky voice or not, that line always stayed with me. When I was older, I even joked about my body by saying “I look so good because I eat so good!” Because let us be honest. Anything refined, sweet and unhealthy is the nicest to eat!
And so it happened, that God showed me a few years ago, while channel hopping on TV (almost as fast as popcorn that jumps while being made), pausing for a brief moment on one or another absurd reality show. I just have to interrupt myself here – my goodness, what a long sentence with very little punctuation marks! I feel out of breath just reading through it….
Anyway, as we were watching these people, everyone in search of something that they do not know what it is that they are looking for (they looked helpless and lost in this show as it was one or another weird dating something or another), God dropped in my spirit You are because I am. It was in English and just like that. For a moment I thought about it and then I realised that this is so true! God referred to Himself as I am who sent Moses to the Pharaoh, did he not? Oh my goodness, did I spell Pharaoh correct??? You know, the guy with the goatie that enslaved the Israelites, the Egyptian king. That is the guy I am talking about!
Jump forward to 2020 or 2021 (I don’t even know anymore when what happened because everything seems like a blur). Somewhere there, I wrote on my own personal Facebook page something similar to this article I am writing, and that we are because God is. But later God expanded even more on this for me.
You are what you eat, what you think and what you speak. And just like that, everything falls into place in my head (I actually cannot explain HOW that happens, it just does). Body, mind or soul (not sure whether to use mind or soul here in Afrikaans it is Liggaam, siel en gees) and spirit. You are that which goes around in your heart (there is a bible verse to this effect is there not? Somewhere in Psalms?). You are what you think in your mind (and then speak). You are what you physically eat.
The power of life and death is in the tongue – it says so in the Bible too….so we must be aware of what we speak, as this manifests in the flesh normally….and actually what you speak starts with what goes on in our hearts, does it not? Does it make sense what I am saying here?
I recon from these Godly thoughts (not me but God for sure!) is where Beroepsvrou started to exist. For YEAAARS I thought that I, Elsie, am the only one that does not wake up with a song in my heart and birds that chirp just for me in the mornings. You know, almost like Snow White that whistles and then all the birds come to do what ever they do for her. I thought that is how it should be….
I know, it is a fairy tale full of lies, but give me credit. I have said it before, I feel like a late bloomer when it comes to things like this (at least I did not come to this realisation now only, probably early 30’s if I really have to draw a timeline for you and no, I did not think the little birdies will do my work for me). Now, to get back to Beroepsvrou…that what you are fits in so nicely with the whole theme of Beroepsvrou and the Pink Feathers range and what I stand for.
Pink Feathers for God. Your spiritual (and soul I suppose) person is fed with what goes on in your mind and heart. From there the Pink Feathers for God….but what God actually showed me is that the apron was the forerunner to the whole Pink Feathers range.
When you put on an apron, you are busy serving other people with food. A bit of a double meaning with the apron. But you are also busy preparing something to feed your body with (you must look after your temple that God gave you – THAT also stands in the Bible).
It feels to me as if I am talking deurmekaar as I call it in Afrikaans. But I believe that God will pull all the strings together here so that those who read this will understand. We also have to constantly refresh our minds and thoughts with God’s word so that our hearts do not turn black and ugly, so that our mouths do not speak curses and our bones do not dry out from this which we speak.
Back to the aprons – recently I had the absolute privilege to bless a local school’s Consumer Study children with aprons (absolutely in order from God) and I further had the privilege to speak to them for 5 minutes (ok maybe 10 minutes, I am not sure), serving them with what God has laid on my heart and Beroepsvrou and the Pink Feathers.
I cannot recall what I said and it felt like I did not talk sense at all, but I believe that seed was sown that day and that it will come up when the time is right…I also know that I am busy growing, learning and that God will absolutely put the right words into my mouth when I go to the next school to serve them with God’s word and to bless them with the aprons.
The conclusion that I want to make about this piece is, you are what you eat, you are what you think and you are what you speak. This is what will manifest in our lives and this is within our control and in our hands. That is actually THE ONLY THING we have control over. Wow, what a wonderful revelation. I have known this for a while now, that this is the only thing we can control, but God has just put it all together so beautifully and finished it off with the blog and the Pink Feathers range…
All the glory be to God always! May this blog always be what God has planted in my heart, to put it into words for others to read and may this NEVER be about me!! He inspires me, gives me the knowledge and wisdom, the vision and talents to do what is busy happening…
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