We all know that there are different seasons and that they all come to an end while moving over to the next one. Not just physical seasons like summer, winter, autumn and spring. No. Emotional and spiritual seasons too.
As it is written in Ecclesiastes 3, there is a time for everything. I think Solomon thought DEEP about things and managed to capture it in words so that we can read it decades and generations later. When I was younger, many of the things he wrote did not make sense to me at all.
But now that I have come of age (how is that for a fancy way of speaking English?) and am perhaps a bit wiser, and I also believe the closer I move to God, many more things start to make sense to me. You see, when you are young, you believe so many lies. Like that 40 is so far away. People that have been out of school for 24 years are old. And that life will stay the same for ever.
Well then. At age 41 I know that 40 is much closer as what I could ever imagine and that 50 is just a nudge away it feels. I AM now part of the people that have been out of school for 24 years, I do not feel ancient, so that statement cannot be true.
The biggest lie that exists is, is that life will stay the same for ever. This is actually two lies caught up into one. Firstly, nothing in life stays the same and secondly no one lives for ever.
So what am I actually trying to say with all my philosophical sayings and thoughts? Well, today, a curve ball was bowled my way and now I must play the shot. I hope I will be able to hit it for a 6, but, I will only know later and not as quickly as one normally knows in a 20/20 cricket match.
You see, the dynamics in our firm is changing. My little sister, the sister from another mister, the trainee (who has not been a trainee for a long time) has to spread her wings. She is ready to leave the nest. To leave footprints of light in the world.
I truly hope that she charged enough with us, not that we are the main source of energy and light. But I believe that we were (and are) like one of the stations where you can recharge your vehicle (the electronic type) to take you further on your journey.
I believe that we are plugged into the Main Source, namely God, and that we managed to carry out His message as we went about working. We laughed a lot, cried a bit less and many times out of frustrations about circumstances that are beyond our control, just looked at each other, shaking our heads and moved on with what needed to be done.
I mean, what employer asks a friend of the bride if she works with her (that while she was working with me)? We still laugh about that extreme blonde moment that I had. But that is how I saw her – rather a little sister or friend than an employee.
I pray that we equipped her with the knowledge the world expects her to have i.t.o. her training and qualification. That she will be more than a gain for any employer. Was it not Richard Branson that had this awesome quote?
Train people well enough so they can leave.Treat them well enough so they do not want to. I truly hope that we got the first part of the quote right and that the reason for her leaving is not due to us abusing and mistreating her.
Maréchelle, you will be missed. I saw you grow up in front of my eyes. From a shy 21 year old girl, to a confident woman and mother with knowledge and wisdom. Stay the person who you are. Make deep impressions in other people’s hearts like you did in ours. Most important of all – let your light shine, as brightly as it possibly can.
With sadness (I could not find the appropriate word for heimweë in English – all I could find is homesickness and that seems to be the wrong word to use) we are now watching how the little bird is ready to leave the nest and spread her wings. We said our goodbyes and cried our tears today. Lynette Berger of Probeta and EI Activator said that someone once told her Jump but build your wings on the way down. There is never a right time in ones life. You must just trust God with the decisions that you have made. Maréchelle, may your wings be built as you take this leap of faith. We are rooting for you from the sidelines!
Ons almal weet daar is verskillende seisoene en dat hulle tot ‘n einde kom en oorgaan in ‘n volgende een. Nie net fisiese seisoene soos somer, winter, herfs en lente nie. Nee. Emosionele en geestelike seisoene ook.
Soos wat dit in Prediker 3 uiteengesit is, dink ek Salomo het DIEP gedink oor goed en dit neergepen vir ons om dekades en generasies later te kan lees. Toe ek jonger was, het baie goed wat hy geskryf het glad nie sin gemaak nie.
Maar noudat ek ouer word, dalk wyser ook en ek glo soos wat ek nader aan God beweeg, begin soveel meer goed vir my sin maak. Jy sien, as jy jonk is, glo jy ‘n paar onwaarhede. Soos dat 40 ongelooflik ver is. Mense wat 24 jaar terug in matriek was stokoud is. En dat die lewe dieselfde gaan bly vir ewig.
Nou ja. Op 41 weet ek dat 40 baie nader is as wat ek ooit kon dink en dat 50 ‘n katspoegie ver is, voel dit vir my. Ek IS nou deel van die mense wat 24 jaar gelede gematrikuleer het, ek voel nie stokoud nie, so daardie stelling kan ook nie waar wees nie.
Die grootste onwaarheid wat daar bestaan, is dat die lewe dieselfde gaan bly vir ewig. Dis eintlik twee onwaarhede vervat in een. Eerstens bly die lewe nie dieselfde nie en tweedens niemand leef vir ewig nie.
Wat probeer ek nou eintlik sê met al my filosofiese oordenkinge? Wel, vandag is ‘n curve ball my kant toe geboul en nou moet ek die hou speel. Ek hoop ek slaan hom vir ‘n 6, maar ek sal eers later weet, nie nou al en so vinnig soos in ‘n 20/20 krieketwedstryd nie.
Jy sien, die dinamika in ons firma gaan verander. My klein sussie, sister from another mister, die klerk (wat lankal nie meer ‘n klerk is nie) se vlerke moet gesprei word. Sy is reg om die nes te verlaat. Haar ligspore te saai in die wêreld in.
Ek hoop sy het genoeg gelaai by ons, nie dat ons die hoofbron van energie en lig is nie. Maar ek glo ons was (en is) soos een van die stasies waar jy jou kar kan herlaai (die elektroniese soort) om jou verder te vat na die volgende deel van jou reis.
Ek glo dat ons wel ingeprop is by die Hoofbron, God en dat ons wel Sy boodskap en wil kon oordra soos wat ons gewerk het. Ons het baie gelag, minder gehuil en baie uit frustrasie met omstandighede buite ons beheer net vir mekaar gekyk en aan beweeg met dit wat ons moes doen.
Ek meen, watter werkgewer vra op haar kombuistee vir ‘n vriendin van die bruid of sy saam met haar werk (terwyl sy saam met my gewerk het)? Ons lag nou nog oor my dowwe oomblik wat ek gehad het. Maar dis hoe ek haar gesien het – eerder as ‘n kleinsussie of vriendin as ‘n werknemer.
Ek bid dat ons haar toegerus het met die wêreldse kennis wat sy kon opdoen i.t.v. haar opleiding en kwalifikasie. Dat sy meer as net ‘n aanwins kan wees vir enige werkgewer. Was dit nie Richard Branson wat hierdie awesome quote gehad het nie?
Train people well enough so they can leave. Treat them well enough so that they do not want to. Ek hoop regtig dat ons die eerste deel van die quote wel aan voldoen het en dat die rede vir die weggaan nie is weens ons mishandeling nie.
Maréchelle, jy gaan gemis word. Ek het jou sien grootword voor my oë. Van ‘n skaam onseker 21 jarige dogtertjie voel dit vir my tot ‘n volwaardige vrou en mamma met selfvertroue, kennis en wysheid. Bly die persoon wie jy is. Trap diep spore in ander se harte soos jy in ons harte getrap het. Belangrikste van alles – laat jou lig skyn, so helder as wat hy kan skyn.
Met heimweë kyk ons nou hoe die babavoëltjie reg is om haar vlerke te sprei. Ons het ons groete gegroet en huile gehuil vandag. Lynette Berger van Probeta en EI Activator het gesê dat iemand vir haar gesê het Jump but build your wings on the way down. Daar is nooit ‘n regte tyd in mens se lewe nie. Jy moet net die Here vertrou vir besluite wat jy geneem het. Maréchelle, mag jou vlerke gebou word soos wat jy die sprong neem! We are rooting for you from the sidelines!
It is 19 June – Father’s day 2022. We are, yet AGAIN late for church. And it is not because we planned it like this or slept until ten past nine. No, that is just how our morning worked out to be. We are working hard at being on time, but it is something that we just cannot achieve at this stage it seems.
At one stage while we are driving to the church, it just felt like we are not getting there while the time is just passing by. Time and tide waits for no man is what went through my mind at that stage. I have been thinking about that saying for a few days now and realised just how true it really is.
At one stage I almost even gave up hope of getting to church. Almost thought that we are going to do something else rather than to attend church. But luckily, we arrived. Rather late than never.
The guest speaker, Alan Sutton takes the stand on the stage. I hang onto every word that this oom is saying (uncle just sounds wrong because to me he is an oom like we refer to elder men in Afrikaans), because, inside me, it is as if that which I have been feeling for such a long time, has been put into words even better than what I could ever tell. He brings together two things that I never thought of in this manner.
Gifts of the spirit and fruits of the spirit. He continues to explain that the Holy Spirit works IN you and then THROUGH you. I hope I remembered correctly, but working IN you is the fruit of the Spirit. You know – the scripture in Galatians where it talks about love, patience, those things that I did not display in the early morning hours this past weekend, when my son, who struggled to sleep again, came to me for help. I was Momster AGAIN.
None the less. Then the Holy Spirit works THROUGH you and this is where the gifts of the Spirit come in. The word of knowledge, speaking in tongues, those things. The stuff that I always thought, growing up, was only available to the people from the Bible and more so, only the disciples and not for us living in modern times.
As he was talking, I suddenly, randomly and out of nowhere, saw a Prism. You know – the one we used at school in Science? The one where you shine the white light in and it breaks it up into the seven colours of the rainbow. That Prism.
I realised that God used this vision, if I can refer to it as such, to show me even better what the oom means. You see, you must first allow the Holy Spirit to work IN you (God’s pure white light shining INTO the Prism) and then He can work THROUGH you (the rainbow colors that is reflected from the Prism). The rainbow colors shows to the world the beauty of God – and the rainbow is God’s promise to us is it not?
We must be light bearers in this dark world. And we must show the world the fruit of the Spirit. Every day, not only Sundays. In everything that we do. This is something that I stand for and what God showed me years ago already. Something I strive for on a daily basis. Something that Kobus Windt, our pastor, also says quite often – sleeping in a garage does not make you a car. In the same manner you cannot be a proper Christian if you only go to church on a Sunday and only act like a Christian on selected times.
I grasp almost immediately what the oom meant and wonder if everyone listening to him really grasped it? You see, something else that I stand for is Righteousness. To ALWAYS do the right thing, even if no one is watching.
This is the symbolic meaning of the Beroepsvrou aprons – the breastplate of Righteousness, when you serve your family while preparing the meals that must feed everyone physically (but also spiritually). You see, I recon you must first get this concept right with those closest to you, before you can show it to the world.
It is not always easy. Like this past weekend’s Momster that came out in me. You see, the moment that my children, that are big and supposed to sleep through, prevent me from sleeping or wake me up just as I had fallen asleep, then Momster comes out sometimes. I sometimes struggle to sleep, if you were wondering why this is such an issue to me. These days the struggle is less than what it used to be in the past. I try my utmost best to be patient in the middle of the night and many times I do get that part right. But, there is the exception to the rule, when I am extremely tired and slept terrible a few nights before, that I fail in this.
To get back to the oom’s message – there are some other things that he said that caught my attention, with scripture, that I want to blog about. And that is God’s breath in our lungs and looking for God in everything (God is in the detail). I am therefore not going to expand on this right now, I will keep that for another entry or two. Because I cannot remember if I have written about this yet? You see, I write as much as what I talk and I talk as much as what I write, I cannot always remember what were mere thoughts and what were words spoken or written.
The long and the short of the message and that which God showed me – are you going to be a prism for Him so that He can use you to expand His kingdom? Are you going to allow His light to shine in and through you so that you can reflect to the world the colours of the rainbow?
I know I am there – more than prepared to be a prism for God’s kingdom. Hundred and ten percent. I am all in for God and His kingdom. Every time I hear the song from Matthew West called All in then I think, I recon I am all in. Boots and all. I want to shout from the rooftops that I am His, like the song from Kim Walker called Rooftops.
It is strange to me that everyone does not feel like I feel. It is then so obvious and logical. I recon God is busy getting everyone’s prisms ready and perhaps why they do not feel quite as passionate yet as what I do.
Some are not in the correct spot where the light shines on it and comes in at the right angle. They are close but not there. Other prisms are still in their boxes that they came in, or perhaps they even placed God in a box, so that the light cannot reach them.
Where does your prism stand? Are you in a place where you can receive God’s light? Have you taken God out of the box you have tried to place Him in? Do you allow Him to work IN you so that He can work THROUGH you? What does your fruits of the Spirit look like and your Spiritual gifts? Are you doing what God placed you on earth to do?
I hope and believe that I do! I don’t always get it right, but I believe that my prism is standing ready to receive God’s light to reflect it back to the world, so that He can work IN me and then THROUGH me as and when needed!
Dis19 Junie – Vadersdag 2022. Ons is ALWEER laat vir kerk. En nie omdat ons dit so beplan het of tot tien oor nege geslaap het nie. Nee, dit het net so uitgewerk. Ons werk hard aan betyds wees maar dit voel my dis iets wat ons ontglip die heeltyd.
Op ‘n stadium toe ons ry, voel dit of ons net nie by die kerk kom nie, dit alles terwyl die tyd net aanstap. Time and tide waits for no man dink ek. Ek dink al ‘n paar dae aan die gesegde en besef net hoe waar dit eintlik is.
Op ‘n kol het ek amper moed opgegee om by die kerk uit te kom. Amper gedink ons gaan maar iets anders doen eerder as kerk toe gaan. Maar gelukkig kom ons daar aan. Liewers laat as nooit.
Die gasspreker, Alan Sutton kom aan die woord. Ek hang aan die oom se lippe want dis asof dit wat ek binne my voel, in nog beter woorde omskep word as wat ek ooit dit sou kon vertel. Hy bring vir my twee goed bymekaar, iets wat ek nooit saam aan gedink het nie.
Geestelike gawes en Vrug van die Gees. Hy gaan voort om te verduidelik dat die Heilige Gees IN jou werk en dan DEUR jou werk. Ek hoop nou ek het reg onthou, maar IN jou werk is die Vrug van die Gees. Jy weet die skrif wat in Galasiërs staan – liefde, lankmoedigheid, daai goed wat ek die afgelope naweek in die vroeë oggend ure, toe my seun weer nie kon slaap nie, glad nie gewys het vir hom nie. Ek was Momster gewees.
Nie te min. Dan werk die Heilige Gees DEUR jou en dis waar die Gawes van die Gees in kom. Die woord van kennis, profesie, tale, uitleg van tale – daai goed. Die goed wat ek altyd, toe ek groot geword het, gedink het NET beskore was vir die mense van die Bybel, en meer nog NET vir die dissipels en nie vir ons hedendaagse mense nie.
Soos die oom praat begin ek skielik (en randomly out of nowhere voel dit vir my) ‘n Prisma sien voor my. Jy weet – die wat ons op skool in Wetenskap gebruik het? Die een wat jy die wit lig laat inskyn het en hy dit opbreek in die sewe kleure van die reënboog.
Ek besef die Here gebruik die visioen, as ek dit nou so kan noem, om vir my nog meer te wys wat die oom bedoel. Jy sien, jy moet eers toelaat dat die Heilige Gees IN jou werk (God se suiwer wit lig wat IN die Prisma skyn) en dan kan Hy DEUR jou werk (die reënboog kleure wat uitkom uit die Prisma uit). Die reënboog kleure wys vir die wêreld die mooi van God – en die reënboog is mos God se belofte aan ons as mens, is dit dan nie?
Ons moet mos ligdraers wees in hierdie donker wêreld. En ons moet vir die wêreld wys dat ons Vrug van die Gees het. Elke dag, nie net Sondae nie. In alles wat ons doen altyd. Dis iets waarvoor ek staan en wat die Here jare terug reeds vir my gewys het. Waarna ek streef elke dag. Iets wat Kobus Windt, ons pastoor, ook gereeld sê – as jy in ‘n garage slaap maak dit jou nie ‘n kar nie. Net so is jy nie ‘n volwaardige Christen as jy kerk toe gaan en slegs op selektiewe tye Christenskap beoefen nie.
Ek snap amper dadelik wat die oom bedoel en wonder net of almal wat na hom luister dit werklik snap. Jy sien, nog iets waarvoor ek staan is Geregtigheid of Righteousness soos dit net vir my mooier klink in Engels. Om ALTYD die regte ding te doen al kyk niemand nie.
Dit waarvoor Beroepsvrou se voorskote simbolies is – die borsharnas van geregtigheid wanneer jy in bediening staan vir jou gesin met die voorbereiding van die maaltyd wat hulle moet voed (fisies en geestelik ook). Jy sien, ek reken jy moet eers dit met jou naaste mense mee regkry voor jy dit vir die wêreld kan gaan wys.
Dis nie altyd maklik nie. Soos ek wat die afgelope naweek ALWEER Momster was. Jy sien die oomblik dat my kinders, wat nou al groot is en veronderstel is om deur te slaap, my verhoed om te slaap of uit die slaap hou, kom Momster soms uit. Ek sukkel meeste van die kere om te slaap, as jy gewonder het hoekom ek na dit verwys. Deesdae slaap ek beter as voorheen. Iets waaroor ek dankbaar is! Ek probeer my bes om geduld in die middel van die nag te beoefen en baie keer kry ek dit reg. Maar daar is die uitsondering op die reël, wanneer ek besonders moeg is en baie sleg geslaap het dat ek vaal hierin.
Om terug te kom na die oom se boodskap toe – daar is nog iets wat hy gesê het wat my aandag gevang het en skrif wat hy genoem het waaroor ek lankal wil blog. En dit is God se asem in ons longe en om die Here te soek in alles (God is in die detail). Ek gaan dus nie nou hieroor nog verder uitbrei nie, ek gaan dit hou vir ‘n ander inskrywing of twee. Want ek kan ook nie onthou of ek al oor so iets geskryf het nie? Ek skryf so baie soos wat ek praat en praat so baie as wat ek skryf, ek kan nie altyd onthou wat was gedagtes en wat was werklik geuiter of geskryf nie.
Die lang en die kort van die oom se boodskap en dit wat die Here vir my gewys het – gaan jy ‘n Prisma wees vir Hom sodat Hy jou kan gebruik om Sy koninkryk uit te brei? Gaan jy toelaat dat Sy lig in jou skyn sodat jy dit kan terug reflekteer vir die wêreld in die kleure van die reënboog?
Ek weet ek is daar – meer as bereid om die prisma vir God se koninkryk te wees. Honderd en tien persent. I am all in vir God en Sy koninkryk. Elke keer as ek die liedjie van Matthew West hoor All in dan dink ek, dat ek reken ek is all in. Boots and all. Ek wil van die dakke af skree vir die wêreld dat ek Syne is soos Kim Walker sing in haar liedjie Rooftops.
Dis vir my vreemd dat almal nie voel soos ek voel nie. Dis dan so logies, eenvoudig en voor die hand liggend (moes daar nou ‘n handvol koppeltekens ingekom het in die laaste woord of stelling?). Nie te min. Ek reken die Here is besig om almal se prisma’s reg te kry en miskien daarom dat hulle nie noodwendig passievol oorkom vir Sy koninkryk nie.
Sommige staan nog nie op die plek waar die lig skyn en op die regte plek val nie. Hulle is naby maar nog nie daar nie. Ander prisma’s is nog al die pad in hul boksies waarin hulle hulself, of dalk selfs God, geplaas het dat die lig net nie hulle bereik nie.
Waar staan jou prisma? Vang jy God se lig op? Het jy al die Here uit die boksie gehaal waarin jy Hom probeer plaas? Laat jy Hom toe om IN jou te werk sodat Hy DEUR jou kan werk ook? Hoe lyk jou Vrug van die Gees en jou Geestelike gawes? Doen jy waarvoor God jou op aarde geplaas het?
Ek hoop en glo dat ek doen. Ekkry dit nie altyd reg nie maar ek glo dat my Prisma regstaan om God se lig terug te weerkaats vir die wêreld, sodat Hy IN my kan werk en dan DEUR my werk soos en wanneer dit nodig is!
Waking up on Monday morning, I feel exhausted, like usual, dragging myself to sit behind the computer to do my work. I struggle to get going. I feel overwhelmed by everything that must happen. Mondays in particular feel short to me. I normally struggle to get into a working mode after a weekend and sometimes I need a weekend after the weekend to just recover from being busy the two preceding days.
While doing my make up, I feel the thoughts moving through my mind and it feels like 1 million things all at once. When is my own hair going to be nice and thick and long like it was before the Pandemic (and maybe even before my mom’s death)? When will I be able to walk into a shop and buy a denim and know that it fits? Without it looking like I jumped from the top of the cupboard to fit into the pants? Why do I write a Blog? Do people really benefit from it? Do I spend enough time with God?
What is on my planning in terms of work for today and the week ahead? Have I REALLY lost weight and centimeters? Is everyone not lying to me? I still cannot find a denim that fits! The joys of being an A-shaped body type. What if all the coffee I have been consuming is actually making me fatter and is busy working against all the exercising? Oh my word, I have eaten A LOT of rusks the past few weeks!!!! I am going to be bloated like a piece of dough….
Do I spend enough time with my kids? Is my child studying enough for school? Are we not supposed to do something more to help him? My word, I suppose I have to wash my hair again, my scalp is itchy. I work out in my mind about washing hair (yes, really, it needs planning too it feels). I am exercising today and Wednesday so it does not help to wash it today or before Wednesday. My day is short today! What am I getting my husband for his birthday? I miss my mom. I wonder about my two sisters and if they have settled in, living happily ever after. I think it will be nice to move. Or will it? Urgh, who is going to do the sorting and throwing away of stuff? We have gathered junk over time that was just supposed to be thrown away to begin with!!
More and more thoughts are just going through my mind, occupying me while getting ready to tackle the day ahead. It frustrates me to do make up daily. Even if it is the bare minimum, it feels like it wastes time. But I do not like going without make up, feeling pale. I like dressing up, making myself look pretty with make up. It frustrates me even more spending so much time blow drying my hair. It also feels like a waste of time, but I look like a lion that stuck its finger into a plug if I do not make it look pretty.
I realise that there is a bit of a cloud hanging over me, something that does not happen that often in comparison with my younger years. I am not sure what the name of the cloud is, but I sense it. I proceed, doing my thing for the day. I get dressed for exercise, travel to Harties, elated to see that I have a training buddy in the Mom’s class. Something that I have not had for about 6 weeks. Or is it 8 weeks? The time flies so quickly I cannot keep count any more.
For 6 (or 8) weeks or how long ever it may be, I have been exercising alone. My fellow moms in the Moms’ class have all disappeared. Just like that, poof and in the blink of an eye, after the April holidays, it was just me. I wonder if the raptures have taken place when it comes to exercising? Am I the only one that did not make the cut for the exercise raptures? There was someone else once or twice during this time, but she decided to stop the class in the time slot that we exercise. She always has work meetings that do not keep to the scheduled time and then she misses class.
In these 6 to 8 weeks that I had been exercising alone, I wanted to give up many times. Stop exercising. I worked out in my mind that I spend 2 hours a week travelling to exercise. I am sure I can do more in that time at home, maybe even exercise for longer. Yeah right I answer myself in the process. It is no fun exercising alone. My kids are not there (their class is closed until August), all my fellow moms are gone, it is just me and the trainer. There is nothing wrong with her. I just do not know her. And she does not know me. The first exercise that she made me do, I thought Seriously, must I pick up weights this light? I can do heavier.
I then tell her that she is welcome to push me a bit harder to exercise more and use heavier weights – I will say something if I cannot do it. I understand that she has no idea where my fitness levels are and what I am capable of and hence the reason for starting with such light weights. As the time passes, I got used to exercising on my own, I even started to enjoy it. I never experienced personal training before in my life and it was actually very nice! A small little blessing from God’s hand, just so that I can say on my CV one day – received personal training (not that I put stuff like that on a CV but I am sure that you understand what I mean). I don’t even have a CV. Anyway MOVING ON!
It was as if she was customising the exercises for me and all my problem areas! She forced me to jog. The first few times I gave her a bit of lip, because I do not like jogging at all. But I do it anyway. I actually start enjoying it – still not CRAZY about it but I know it does something for the goal I am working towards. Sometimes I cannot put one foot in front of the other after one round’s exercise, but the jogging is nice some how in a weird and unique way. To clean your head some how and to just recover from the hard work during the WOD.
Monday, after the exercise session, I am measured. Again I am sweating in strange places, like I have been doing since I started my personal training (unwillingly). Marisa was so excited after taking my first measurement – around my waist. I lost 8 centimeters! I look at her and think she must be joking. She pinches and measures me in weird places whose names I cannot pronounce, writing it all down. I can feel how the cloud that was hanging around my head is lifting away – was I subconsciously nervous about the measurements and that I would deliver no results?
Today, Thursday 16 June 2022, I received my results. A total of 23,5 cm was lost (that is if I doubled the right results – because I have two legs and arms and only one of each was measured). Really? Can it be? I did not purposefully take on a weight loss challenge. I mean, I have been exercising with the purpose of losing weight, but in the 2 years I have been doing so, I have not really lost any weight or centimeters, in my opinion. I really thought I was going to be one of those people who is now exercising only to not put on more weight. I will stay Dik-a-licious as my husband often jokes with me, singing parts of the song by Snotkop, trying to lift my mood if I feel down about my weight.
With a grateful and thankful heart, I designed something to show the results better so that one can see where I have lost what. I am sharing it with this entry. I also went to count how many weeks it was since my last measurement. It was 7 and a half weeks ago that I measured and officially started training with Marisa. Just between us – I have never in my life done anything like this, measuring myself and then comparing results later. It is all a new concept to me. In this time I also did not exercise 2x per week every week, due to public holidays, a sore throat, swine flu, bronchitis and who knows what was standing between Marisa and I exercising.
I am convinced in my heart that, if I had eaten better and exercised 2x per week in that time, the results would have been even better. I am super excited about the journey that lies ahead. Eventually I feel like I am on the right road. I still drink my coffee, full cream milk coffee nogal and more than one per day. I cut back on the number of cups per day, as well as taking in starch during the week and empty calories in the form of chocolates, salty snacks, chips and so forth. I must now just work purposefully at my rusks intake. Good golly miss Molly, I just LOVE rusks with a lovely full cream milk coffee!
I don’t think I am THERE when it comes to food. I know I can do better. With God’s help and guidance, I can do even better. But, in my heart I feel that I must make small changes over a period of time, lifestyle changes you know? Rather than one massive change all at once. I just cannot cope with too much change at once. Every day’s little bit every single day.
Exercising twice per week for longer times does deliver good results! I cannot exercise five days in the week, as I really would like to do! As I close off here, I realise that God gave me one of my heart’s desires without me nagging Him for it day in and day out. A few years ago, I looked with puppy dog eyes, at a friend’s post on Facebook about her weight loss results, the photo of the big T-shirt vs the size she wore at that time (and still does), probably while I was munching away at another piece of rusk and not exercising at all.
I look at the title for this entry and laugh by myself. I recon I wrote about everything in between too. I realise again that God is in the detail, as usual. He knows what He plans for us. Plans of prosperity. Even if it is something as small and insignificant like becoming fitter, losing weight and becoming firmer. Something I always said that I will do ONE DAY. Well, my ONE DAY has arrived and it was also because I did something purposefully about it. I did not continue to moan and groan with a chocolate in one hand and a Coke in the other hand, all the time while not exercising.
Maandagoggend staan ek op. Moeg, soos altyd voel dit, en sleep weer myself om te gaan sit voor die rekenaar. Ek sukkel om aan die gang te kom. Voel oorweldig deur als wat moet gebeur. Veral Maandae voel vir my kort. Ek sukkel gewoonlik na ‘n naweek om weer te werk en soms kort ek ‘n naweek na ‘n naweek om te recover van die besig wees die twee dae voor dit.
Terwyl ek my grimering doen gaan daar, wat voel soos 1 miljoen goed, deur my gedagtes alles op dieselfde tyd. Wanneer gaan my eie hare nou lekker dik en lank wees soos wat dit was voor die Pandemie (en dalk nog voor my ma se dood)? Wanneer gaan ek weer by ‘n winkel kan instap en net ‘n denim koop en weet hy pas? Sonder dat dit lyk of ek van die kas af ingespring het om in die broek te pas? Hoekom skryf ek ‘n Blog? Baat mense by dit? Spandeer ek genoeg tyd saam met God?
Wat is op my beplanning i.t.v. werk vir vandag en die week wat voorlê? Het ek REGTIG gewig en sentimeters verloor? Jok almal nie vir my nie? Ek kry dan steeds nie ‘n denim wat lekker pas nie. The joys of being an A-shaped body type. Wat as al die koffie wat ek so lekker aan weglê in die winter my eintlik vetter maak en teen al die oefening werk? O genade, ek het BAIE beskuit geëet die afgelope ruk!!! Ek gaan soos ‘n stuk deeg begin uit rys…
Spandeer ek genoeg tyd aan my kinders? Leer my kind genoeg vir skool? Moet ons nie nog iets doen om hom te help nie? Jitte, ek moet seker weer een of ander tyd my hare was, my kopvel jeuk. Ek werk uit in my kop oor die hare was (ja regtig dit kort ook beplanning voel dit vir my). Ek oefen vandag en Woensdag so dit help nie om dit vandag of voor Woensdag te was nie. My dag is kort vandag! Wat gaan ek vir my man kry vir sy verjaarsdag? Ek mis my ma. Ek wonder oor my twee susters en of hulle nou lekker bly. Ek dink dit sal lekker wees om te trek. Of sal dit? Urgh, wie gaan al die uitsorteer en wegsmyt werk doen? Ons gaar dan goed op wat eintlik lankal weggegooi moes wees!!
So gaan daar net nog meer en meer gedagtes deur my en okkupeer my terwyl ek klaar maak om die dag aan te pak. Dit frustreer my om elke dag te moet grimering doen, al is dit net die minimum, dit voel of dit tyd mors. Maar ek loop nie graag sonder grimering nie, ek hou nie van vaal voel nie. Ek hou van mooi maak. Dit frustreer my nog meer om so baie tyd te spandeer om hare droog te blaas. Dit mors ook tyd maar ek lyk soos ‘n leeu wat sy vinger in ‘n prop gedruk het as ek nie dit netjies maak nie.
Ek besef daar hang ‘n effense wolk oor my, iets wat redelik min deesdae gebeur in vergelyking met toe ek jonger was. Ek kan nie vir jou sê wat is die wolk se naam nie, maar hy is daar. Ek gaan aan en werk en doen my ding. Trek aan om te gaan oefen, ry Harties toe, verheug om weer ‘n metgesel in die Mom’s class te hê. Iets wat ek 6 weke laas gehad het. Of is dit nou 8 weke? Die tyd vlieg so verby ek hou nie meer tred nie.
Vir 6 (of 8) weke of hoe lank ookal dit mag wees, oefen ek alleen. My mede moms in die Moms’ class het almal net verdwyn. Net so poof in ‘n oogwink, na die April vakansie, toe is dit net ek. Ek wonder of die wegraping gebeur het wat oefen betref? Is ek die enigste een wat nie die cut gemaak het vir die wegraping nie? Daar was so een of twee keer iemand anders, maar sy het maar besluit om op te hou oefen op die tyd wat ons doen, want sy het altyd werksvergaderings wat gewoonlik nie by hul tyd hou nie en dan mis sy klas.
In hierdie 6 tot 8 weke wat ek alleen geoefen het, wou ek al baie keer moed opgee. Ophou oefen. Ek werk in my kop uit dat ek 2 ure per week spandeer om heen en weer te ry om te oefen. Ek is seker ek kan baie meer in daardie tyd by die huis doen, dalk nog langer self oefen. Yeah right antwoord ek myself in die proses ook. Dis nie lekker om alleen te oefen nie. My kinders is nie daar nie (hul klas is toe tot Augustus toe), al my mede moms is weg, dis net ek en die afrigter. Daar is niks fout met haar nie. Ek ken haar net nie. En sy ken my nie. Die eerste oefening wat sy my laat doen het, het ek gedink Seriously, moet ek nou sulke ligte gewigte optel? Ek kan swaarder.
Ek sê maar toe vir haar dat sy welkom is om my te druk om meer en swaarder te oefen – ek sal sê as ek nie kan nie. Ek verstaan sy het nie ‘n idee waar my fiksheidsvlak is en waartoe ek in staat is nie en daarom dat ons so lig begin het. Soos wat die tyd aangaan, het ek begin gewoond raak aan die alleen oefen, dit eintlik begin geniet. Ek het nog nooit personal training beleef in my lewe nie, en dit was heerlik gewees! So ‘n ou blessing uit God se hand, net sodat ek ook eendag op my CV kan skryf – received personal training (nie dat ek nou sulke goed op ‘n CV skryf nie maar ek is seker jy verstaan wat ek bedoel). Ek het nie eens ‘n CV nie. Anyway MOVING ON!
Dit was asof sy die oefeninge customise vir my en al my probleem areas! Sy forseer my om te draf. Die eerste paar keer gee ek haar so bietjie lip want ek hou niks van draf nie. Maar ek doen dit tog. Ek begin dit eintlik geniet, die drawwery nou – steeds nie MAL oor dit nie maar ek weet dit doen iets vir die doel waarheen ek werk. Al kan ek soms nie een tree voor die ander gee na ‘n rondte se oefening nie, is die draf lekker op ‘n unieke manier. Om kop te kan skoonmaak op ‘n manier en net recover na die harde werk in die WOD.
Na die oefening Maandag, word ek gemeet. Ek sweet alweer op vreemde plekke, soos wat ek gedoen het sedert ek personal training onwillekeurig ontvang het. Marisa is so opgewonde toe sy my eerste mate neem – om my middel. Ek het 8 sentimeter verloor! Ek kyk so na haar en dink eers sy maak ‘n grap. Sy knyp en meet verder op weird plekke wie se name ek nie kan uitspreek nie en skryf alles neer. Ek voel hoe die wolkie begin lig wat oor my kop gehang het – was ek die heeltyd, onbewustelik nervous oor my meting en dat ek eintlik niks sou verloor nie?
Ek ontvang vandag, Donderdag 16 Junie 2022 die resultate. ‘n Totaal van 23,5 cm wat verloor is (dis nou bygesê as ek die regte resultate verdubbel het want ek het twee arms en bene en net een van elk was gemeet). Regtig? Kan dit wees? Ek het dan regtig nie doelbewus ‘n gewigsverlies ding aangepak nie. Ek meen, ek oefen omdat ek graag maerder wil word maar omdat ek vir 2 jaar eintlik nie regtig in my opinie sentimeters of gewig verloor het nie, het ek begin dink ek is maar dan een van daai mense wat maar net oefen om nie dikker te word nie. Ek sal maar Dik-a-licious bly soos my man soms grap en die liedjie van Snotkop sing om my op te beur as ek mismoedig voel oor my gewig.
Met ‘n dankbare hart het ek ‘n ietsie ontwerp om die twee resultate teen mekaar af te speel sodat mens nog beter kan sien waar ek wat verloor het. Ek deel dit graag met hierdie inskrywing. Ek het ook gaan tel oor hoeveel weke dit was sedert my eerste meting tot die afgelope week. Dit was 7 en ‘n halwe weke terug dat ek gemeet het en amptelik by Marisa begin oefen het. Net so tussen ons – ek het nog nooit in my lewe gemeet soos wat sy my gemeet het nie – dis alles ‘n nuwe konsep vir my. In die tyd het ek nie altyd 2x per week geoefen nie a.g.v. vakansie dae en ‘n seer keel, varkgriep, bronchitus en wie weet wat nog wat ons terug gehou het sodat ek en Marisa nie kon oefen nie.
Ek is in my hart oortuig, as ek beter geëet het en 2x per week geoefen het in die tyd, dat die resultate nog meer sou wees. Ek is super opgewonde vir die reis wat voorlê. Uiteindelik voel dit vir my of ek op die regte pad is. Ek drink steeds my koffie, ‘n volroom melkkoffie nogal en meer as een per dag. Ek het wel gesny op dit, stysel inname in die week en leë kalorieë in die vorm van sjokolades, sout happies, skyfies, en so meer. Ek moet nou net weer doelbewus werk aan my beskuit inname. Liewe hemel maar ek is lief vir beskuit saam met ‘n heerlike volroom melkkoffie!
Ek dink nie ek is al DAAR wat kos aanbetref nie! Ek weet ek kan beter. Met die Here se hulp en leiding kan ek verseker nog meer verbeter. Maar, ek voel in my hart dat ek klein veranderinge moet doen oor ‘n tydperk, lifestyle changes jy weet? Eerder as massiewe aanpassings op een slag. Ek kan net nie cope met te veel verandering op een slag nie. Elke dag se bietjie elke dag.
Twee maal per week oefen vir langer tye het tog ‘n goeie resultaat! Ek kan nie vyf dae ‘n week oefen soos ek graag sou wou nie. Soos wat ek hier afsluit, besef ek, dat die Here een van my hartsbegeertes laat waar word het, sonder dat ek heeldag en aldag oor dit geneuel het by Hom. Ek het so ‘n paar jaar terug met leep ogies gekyk hoe ‘n vriendin haar gewigsverlies resultate op Facebook geplaas het, die Groot T-hemp teen die grootte wat sy nou dra afgeneem het. In verwondering gestaan, tien teen een terwyl ek weer ‘n stuk beskuit in my mond geprop het en glad nie geoefen het nie.
Ek kyk weer na my opskrif vir hierdie inskrywing. Ek grinnik by myself. Ek reken ek het oor alles tussen in ook gepraat. Ek besef net opnuut dat God in die detail is, soos altyd. Hy weet wat Hy vir ons beplan. Planne van voorspoed en nie teëspoed nie. Al is dit iets onbenullig soos om fikser te word, gewig te verloor, ferm te word. Iets wat ek altyd gesê het ek EENDAG sal doen. Wel, my EENDAG het gearriveer en dit was ook omdat ek iets daadwerkliks omtrent dit begin doen het en nie aanhou sanik het met ‘n sjokolade in die een hand en ‘n Coke in die ander hand nie, dit alles terwyl ek glad geen oefening ingekry het nie.
The scripture for this month is from Proverbs. It is so interesting to me, yet I am not surprised that each month’s scripture verses on the desk pad calendar have been so applicable and appropriate in my life thus far.
Commit your works to the Lord, and your plans will succeed. I have thought about this a lot and what it actually means. Thank goodness I have a bible application on my phone where I can compare different versions. At first I read this in the Afrikaans 1953 version. I decide to read it in the Amplified version too.
After reading it in this version, a better and brighter light goes on for me. To me it feels as if the interpretations in brackets after each part of the verse explains it a bit better. You see, it does not say that you have to sit and do nothing. You must not sit and wait for your proverbial ship to come in (only realising later that you have been waiting at the airport or train station rather than at the harbour). Nor does it imply that you have to wait for the “right” time.
Not at all! You must place your works, that which you do, at God’s feet and trust Him with it. Your plans and things that you do will work out when you submit to His will and when you listen to His guidance in your life.
During the month of May I wondered a lot about something (that which I felt that God was pressing on my heart to do) and whether I should or should not do it. 30 May 2022 I received a video from someone via Whatsapp. I did not watch it immediately, as it arrived during work hours and I am supposed to work during that time rather than watching Whatsapp videos. And just like that, the day passes and I completely forget to watch the video.
That evening, around 7 o’clock, I received exactly the same video from a friend who does not know the other person that sent me the video earlier that day. There was no way that my friend would have known that I received the exact same video that morning. But God knew it. You see, I prayed and asked for a sign for that which I felt that God placed on my heart to do.
I then received it in a total different manner than what I expected to receive it. Sometimes we are so narrow minded and want to receive, like Gideon, exact answers and signs, as WE want it and think it should be. The content of the video? An attorney that testifies how he flew on a small plane with a pilot that passed out when they flew into the clouds.
Long story short, he and the other passenger managed to get hold of a control tower and that person lead them through the clouds, warning them of a mountain they would have flown into had they not changed their direction. This was so profound to hear this. As this is exactly how I feel in my life.
It feels like I am flying in thick clouds, uncertain of where I am going with Beroepsvrou. I do know that I should listen to my instincts, as my instincts come from God. He is busy leading me. I stood in awe when I read the June scripture two days later, on my desk pad. I was in awe about God and how big He is. How could I have known last year, when I selected the scriptures randomly for each month, that the one for June would be perfect for what is happening in my life right now?
Some days the clouds feel thicker than others. I just know that I must listen to my Control Tower’s voice. He can see everything. I can hardly see three steps ahead of me. Even if what I must do makes no logical sense at that point in time, I just know, that if I do not do it, I will fly into a mountain.
I cannot see the Person in the Control Tower. But I can listen to His voice, following His exact instructions, irrespective of what is busy happening around me. Irrespective if it feels as if more clouds are moving in. It links up with this month’s scripture so beautifully. Making me realise again HOW BIG God is!
Commit your works to the Lord, and your plans will succeed. Trust Him. Listen to Him. Even if nothing makes sense. Even if life throws you curve balls that you did not expected. God is in tomorrow and next week and next year. He knows what is going to happen. Sometimes He lets things fall into place without you realising what is busy happening.
Things happen at times, which are so frustrating to me and which I do not always understand. But it is in these situations that I must trust God. Listening to His voice and following His instructions, how strange they may seem to me and those around me. As the clouds roll in, it sounds as if my frequency with the Control Tower is not that clear and becomes static, causing me not to hear clearly.
I tune in again by reading my Bible and seeking God’s hand in little things and daily bible verses. God is in the detail. I sit and blog, because it is as if my frequency is tuned in when I do this and I can hear clearer than before. As I close off this article, I just know, deep down inside my spirit, that the decision that I took after receiving the video, was the correct one.
The clouds are still coming in and the devil is trying to silence the Voice with distractions, but I know what I have to do. It is what it is, it is my destiny. The place where my life (and us as a family) is going. I pray for little turbulence and that we will not become nauseous as we proceed through everything, and that we will come out stronger on the other side (like we normally do when we go through things in our life). I ensure that my radio’s frequency is tuned in, before I take on the next part of the flight, the one that feels like it is in thick clouds.
Hierdie maand se skrif vers kom uit Spreuke uit. Dis vir my so interessant, dog nie verbasend nie, dat die skrifverse vir elke maand op die desk pad kalender, so van toepassing is (of is dit nou was?) tot dusver.
Laat jou werke aan die Here oor, dan sal jou planne uitgevoer word. Ek het al baie gedink hieroor en wat dit nou eintlik beteken. Dankie tog ek het ‘n bybel toepassing (fêncy woord vir application) op my foon wat verskillende vertalings kan vergelyk. Ek gaan lees hom in die Amplified weergawe.
Daar gaan ‘n beter en helderder liggie vir my aan toe ek dit in hierdie weergawe lees. Die interpretasies in hakkies langs elke deel in die skrif vers verduidelik dit so bietjie beter voel ek. Jy sien, dit sê nie jy moet agteroor sit en niks doen nie. Jy moet nie sit en wag vir jou spreekwoordelike skip om in te kom nie (om later agter te kom jy was die heeltyd by die lughawe of treinstasie terwyl jy eintlik by die hawe moes wees nie). Of wag vir die tyd om reg te wees nie.
Nee, glad nie. Jy moet jou werke, dit wat jy doen, voor die Here se voete plaas en dit aan Hom toevertrou. Jou planne en werke sal deurgevoer word wanneer jy aan Sy wil onderdanig is en na Sy leiding in jou lewe luister.
Ek het Mei maand baie gewonder oor iets (wat ek gevoel het die Here op my hart geplaas het om te doen) en moet ek of moet ek nie. 30 Mei 2022 ontvang ek ‘n video van iemand via Whatsapp. Ek kyk hom nie dadelik nie, want dit het in werkstyd gearriveer en ek moet mos nou werk in daardie tyd, nie Whatsapp video’s sit en kyk nie. So gaan die dag verby en ek vergeet skoon om die video te kyk.
Daardie aand, seker so 7 uur, ontvang ek presies dieselfde video van ‘n vriendin af wat nie die ander persoon wat dit die oggend vir my gestuur het ken nie. Daar was geen manier dat my vriendin enigsins kon weet dat ek dieselfde video ontvang het vroeër die dag nie. Maar die Here het wel dit geweet. Jy sien, ek het gebid en gevra vir ‘n teken vir dit wat ek voel Hy op my hart geplaas het om te doen.
Toe ontvang ek dit op ‘n heeltemal ander manier as wat ek verwag het. Ons is soms so narrow minded en wil soos Gideon ons presiese antwoord en teken van God te ontvang soos ONS dit wil hê en dink dit moet wees. Die inhoud van die video? ‘n Prokureer wat getuig hoe hy op ‘n klein vliegtuig gevlieg het saam met ‘n vliënier wat bewusteloos geraak het toe hulle in die wolke in gevlieg het.
Lang storie kort, hy en die ander passasier in die vliegtuig kry toe ‘n beheertoring in die hande deur die radio en daardie persoon het hulle gelei in die wolke, hulle gewaarsku teen ‘n berg waarin hulle sou vasvlieg as hulle nie van koers verander het nie. Dit was vir my so profound gewees om dit te hoor. Want dis presies hoe ek voel in my lewe.
Dit voel of ek in digte wolke vlieg, onseker waarheen ek oppad is met Beroepsvrou. Ek weet wel dat ek na my instinkte moet luister want my instinkte kom van die Here af. Hy is besig om my te lei. Toe ek twee dae later die skrif vir Junie lees op my desk pad, staan ek net in verwondering. Oor God en hoe groot Hy is. Hoe sou ek enigsins laas jaar geweet het, toe ek die desk pad se skrif verse randomly toegeken het aan elke maand, dat die een vir Junie perfek sou wees vir wat in my lewe gebeur?
Sommige dae voel die wolke digter as ander. Ek weet net ek moet na my Beheertoring se stem luister. Hy kan alles sien. Ek kan skaars drie treë voor my sien. Al maak dit wat ek moet doen nie noodwendig sin op daardie oomblik nie, weet ek net dat as ek dit nie doen nie, ek in ‘n berg sal vas vlieg.
Ek kan nie die Persoon in die beheertoring sien nie. Maar ek kan na Sy stem luister, Sy instruksies volg, ongeag wat besig is om te gebeur om my. Ongeag of dit voel of daar nog meer digte wolke besig is om in te beweeg. Dit sluit vir my so mooi aan by die maand se skrif. En laat my net weereens besef HOE GROOT God is!
Laat jou werke aan die Here oor, dan sal jou planne uitgevoer word. Vertrou Hom. Luister na Hom. Al maak goed nie sin nie. Al gooi die lewe curve balls na jou toe wat jy nie verwag nie. Die Here is reeds in môre en volgende week en volgende jaar. Hy weet wat gaan gebeur. Soms laat Hy goedjies in plek val sonder dat jy besef wat besig is om te gebeur.
Tot my grootste frustrasies by tye gebeur dinge wat ek nie altyd verstaan nie. Maar dis in hierdie situasies wat ek die Here moet vertrou en na Sy stem moet luister, Sy instruksies volg, hoe vreemd dit ook al mag klink en lyk vir my en die om my. Soos wat die wolke in rol, klink dit of my frekwensie by tye krapperig raak en ek nie die Beheertoring lekker duidelik kan hoor nie.
Ek verstel dit deur die Bybel te lees en God se hand in goedjies en daaglikse bybel verse te soek. God is in the detail. Ek gaan sit en blog want dan is dit asof my frekwensie weer reg gestel word en ek beter kan hoor. Soos wat ek afsluit, weet ek net binne in my gees, dat die besluit wat ek tog wel geneem het na die video wat ek ontvang het, die regte een was.
Die wolke kom steeds in en die duiwel probeer die Stem stil maak met distractions maar ek weet wat ek moet doen. Dit is wat dit is, dis my bestemming, my bestuuring. Die plek waarheen my (en ons as gesin) se lewens oppad is. Ek bid maar net vir min turbulensie en dat ons nie naar sal raak soos wat ons deur alles gaan nie en dat ons wel sterker aan die ander kant sal uitkom (soos wat ons maar altyd doen wanneer ons deur dingetjies gaan in ons lewens). Ek maak seker dat my radio se frekwensie reg is, voordat ek die volgende deel van die vlug, in wat soos digte wolke voel, aanpak.
Welcome to my blog and online store. All A4 and A5 notebooks as well as mousepads marked down by 15%. Visit the online store on this webpage today to view products available. Dismiss
Manage Cookie Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional
Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes.The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
