Note the pun in the heading. Anyway, back to my experience of this thing called training and ethics….so at first I rolled my eyes (I have said this before) at having to do training about being ethical. To me it comes naturally and that is my expectation that I have of others.
Clearly everyone does not function like I do (what a shocker to my system but a reality and truth). But as I work through everything, I realise that there is something deeper here. Of course no one can be taught to be ethical! But you can start to think about your thoughts and how it influences your life and actions.
I was freaking out somewhere between September 2021 and February 2022 about this ethics training. Everytime I get a notification about new content (at the beginning of the month) I almost start to hyperventilate. Because seriously, WHERE am I supposed to find the time to DO that which is expected of me. I only did month 1 by end December and now I have to catch up 11 months in something like 8 months or less (I don’t know, I did not calculate this and quite frankly my brain is too exhausted to calculate how many months are left of my 12 months ethics).
Then, amongst all the chaos I was experiencing, God calmed my thoughts. It is ok to fall behind. It happens. Again I was freaking out because now I am only in month 2’s journalling that has to take place daily and HOW AM I GOING TO DO THIS??? I was almost screaming in my mind to God (with respect). Throwing a tantrum.
It took me the whole of January to figure a lot of things out, including this training that I have to fit into a very busy schedule. Then somewhere between screaming and freaking out, the light came on. What this process is trying to teach you is to not start your journal entries with Dear diary. Nope. What they are trying to get us to do is to declutter your mind of stuff and thoughts that occupy you and steal your joy and focus.
Once you start writing them down and getting them out of your mind, you can become more focussed on the day ahead. Easier said than done BUT this is the bottom line I think. We have so much clutter on so many levels in our lives, it is SCARY! It becomes intimidating and when you see again you are overwhelmed, underpeforming and anxious all at the same time.
I made a conscious decision during the first week of Feb, to just START with this training and just do it. And I did. And that makes me feel more accomplished because I am making baby steps in progress….and guess what??? You don’t HAVE to do every day’s journalling for month 2 before you can proceed to month 3.
No, you can journal daily, watch month 2’s videos (and read the material by the way), do the assessment and move on to month 3. That is what I am going to do. I can answer more than one daily journalling thought if I want to, there are no rules, so it is manageable to actually catch up.
What I am also going to do, is combine what ever is added on in month 3 with month 2’s journalling and just expand. I have no idea what month 3 has installed for me but I am ready for it. Thank goodness I have a higher power (called God if you were wondering) watching over me. What I also started doing, is to answer 2 to 3 journalling questions on one day. That way I will also make progress and catch up!! My plan for this is like every plan in life – under development and subject to change.
God inspires me, calms me, gives me my plans to overcome my fears and problems I face daily so that I can so something as simple as this ethics training. It is really not that hard and it will really benefit me in the long run. You see, what you, the reader of this article, don’t see is, in the background there are all these anxiety thoughts I have daily about stuff, life, kids, work.
This affects my ability to work and be productive. So to the outside world I look like something, I don’t know what to compare myself with, but I appear to be something I am not, to others. I put on a brave face daily, smile and waive, fake it till you make it type of attitude, which is what others perceive to be this thing which I am not.
However, between writing this blog, doing my bible study while blogging and journaling my thoughts like I am being thaught in this course, I am actually becoming something and someone better than what I was before. This all helps me to declutter my mind and not be as panicked as I used to be.
I still don’t get it right on a daily basis, but some days are better than others. This all is a learning and developing process to me. And of course God showed me what I could use one of my Beroepsvrou diaries for! For this ethics journalling and daily bible verses!
One thing I have noted, is, after I started writing this article at the beginning of February, an amount of time has lapsed. Two weeks (or is it three?) have passed and I am trying my utmost best to do this ethics journaling daily on a weekday (weekends are different because then our routine is slightly different). Anyway, back to what I am trying to say. When you answer the journaling questions (that just gets your mind going) about how you can improve, for example on finishing tasks, it is like the devil and all the spawn of the devil, attacks you on what you wrote down.
To me this is very interesting, yet nothing new. You see, when ever this happens to me, I grin and I take note of this, because when I feel under attack, I know I am on the right track! The devil also knows my potential and he will try everything to stop me from doing what needs to be done.
Don’t be discouraged if you have had a two to three week period like I have after starting this ethics journaling. It only means you are doing something right and you must persevere and push through! And as if God just wants to confirm what I am saying here, I get a bible verse shortly after finishing up this article – 2 Thessalonians 3:3. What a powerful and profound scripture to get when feeling like you are under attack!
So, if you are still wondering if it will be worth it to do this course, or where you will find the time – stop overthinking it. Stop procrastinating like I did for months. Just start doing and before you know it, you will be so much more knowledgeable than what you were before you started this whole thing.
One thing I have noted from this training is you HAVE TO READ everything!! Before you attempt the questions and assessment, make sure you READ the content…after all, it will only strengthen your knowledge and self-worth.
I can conclude that I can do all things with Christ! Phillipians 4:13. I can even do this training thing, work AND be a mom! And nogal in February, our busiest month! Because really, WHEN is it a good time to start? It is now or never!
To be continued…..
Die Deurlopende Etiese Opleiding duur voort…. Maand 2
