I survived THE CRASH. Not a car crash or a plane crash. A computer crash. Yes you read correctly – for the second time in my life as a business owner, this has happened.
The first time was 15 years ago and let me tell you, I did not deal with it like I did now. I was upset and crying the whole time. Wasting precious time and energy on something that was out of my control.
This time it was different. It was a new laptop, 3 months old. No work data lost, but other personal and business data (that I decided to store electronically on my C: due to the sensitivity of the information) was lost.
Yet, all was not lost if this makes sense? My e-mails are on a web based platform, so I only lost really old e-mails from longer than 4 years ago. Let me rather say, I cannot access them now. This is probably ok as the information is not necessarily relevant you know?
All the business documents are on e-mail on the web, I just have to locate them again and save them like I used to. Fill in the gaps from when I got the new computer to now. Long and short is I can work around it. It is a pain, but it can be done. My biggest frustration? Not being able to work for 3 days while trying to recover data, setting up on another laptop…..trying to remember links, etc.
I told the people that work for me I feel like I started a new job! I am there, earning a salary but not contributing to pay the salary. I felt lost, hopeless with no one to guide me as to what to do!
This whole week a song has been playing in my mind. Matthew West’s Brand New. I could not understand WHAT God was trying to tell me with this song? If you listen to the words, it is more applicable, in my opinion, to someone that has just turned their life around.
I then felt deep in my spirit God pressing on my heart so many things I have been praying about for so long. Things that He says MUST happen. Things that I was doubting on whether I HEARD correctly. He sends me 2 verses confirming something that must be done, one verse overlapping in two messages if that makes sense? I got three messages, coincidently the second one I received, had both verses on.
When I realised that the laptop was crashing I prayed for it. I anointed it. I bound the work of the devil, because I thought it was him trying to stop me from doing what God had laid on my heart to do. I just did not grab the garlic to keep the vampires away (as some myths teach people)…. I was frustrated but calm at the same time. Never in my life had I been this calm about something as big as this. Remember – this is my WORK LIFE that is going up in smoke so to speak!
But, the more I thought about it, the more I realised that God allowed this to happen. He created order for me because He saw that I could not create it! You see, I had a system on Outlook. It worked wonderfully for me, or so I thought. But that system that I had was actually driving me into the ground, causing me to not function efficiently!
I was in such a daze feeling overwhelmed all of the time, that I was still operating in 2020 mode to some extent. Doing what I had to do to survive….not really winning and making progress. I have to laugh at God’s sense of humour! He is now forcing me to write on a piece of paper again, especially work stuff. I always had lists, but my lists got lists. Things were written on little pieces of paper, post it notes, scrap paper. They were there but all over the show. Everywhere! Name it and it had a list on it!
You see, what I realised was, we are so dependent on technology to create order, that when technology fails us, we are lost. The Boxwood tree that I am felt LOST and out of control. I feel God’s Spirit pressing on my heart to just LISTEN to what He wants me to do. “Create order the way I taught you long ago” I hear the whisper in my soul. “Write it down, mark it off when done. Stay focused on what you need to do when your time to do it is there.”
Suddenly I realise WHY the song was playing around in my head this whole week. It is because God wants to make something new. He is making me new on different levels in places that I did not know I had to be fixed and made new.
He’s making you new….He is making you brand new! I hear the words turn and turn in my mind. “I know God. I understand.” is my answer. Here is to the newness being created! May God’s name be glorified always, especially in all that He has pressed on my heart to do.
Die “crash”…..
